CCC Part 7 Interpersonal Communication
6 Pages

CCC Part 7 Interpersonal Communication

Course Number: SPCH 277, Fall 2010

College/University: DeVry Kansas City

Word Count: 1498

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I n terpersonal Communication CCC 1 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS Abbigail Hjerpe Interpersonal Communication CCC DeVry University Online Interpersonal Communication Professor Gordon McLean February 20, 2011 I n terpersonal Communication CCC 2 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS 7A: Planning Planned February 8, 2011 Today my husband finally...

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n I terpersonal Communication CCC 1 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS Abbigail Hjerpe Interpersonal Communication CCC DeVry University Online Interpersonal Communication Professor Gordon McLean February 20, 2011 I n terpersonal Communication CCC 2 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS 7A: Planning Planned February 8, 2011 Today my husband finally snapped about the car accident. I was waiting for this to happen, he has been too calm and I wrecked and might have totaled my car. This happened last Saturday and he has been to calm and I thought eventually something would happen to set him off. Finally I guess it did he got upset about something I did and started using his mouth to say words that I knew he didnt mean. He was upset and while he sat across from me and downgraded me I listened to him. Not saying a word not changing my body or facial expressions. I just sat in my seat and finally when he was done I stood up and turned my back on him and walked away. I knew this would upset him but I felt like trash after the things he said to me tonight. This really made him mad and I dont blame him but I dont think he could blame me for not wanting to talk to him after hearing what he was saying. Unplanned: February 12, 2011: I was in a car accident a week ago today and I had three other people in the car with me. There was myself, my son, a friend of my husbands, and his son. His son is 9 years old, and he was in the car with a seatbelt on and he was not injured. The mother of his son came to my house today and she was ready to beat me up. She was very upset that I didnt call her and she was ready to fight. I honestly was scared I am not a fighting person. I asked her to come into I n terpersonal Communication CCC 3 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS my house luckily my son and husband were at another friends house. She came in and she was very upset. I didnt know what to do but I knew not to leave the room because she was very upset. Finally she sat down and I started asking her questions. I asked her why she was upset with me. I thought starting with the basics meant she wouldnt leave anything out. So I kept asking questions and I kept listening to her. She brought up some very good points like the fact that I should have called her. I told her that since his father was there I didnt think it was that big of a deal. I then told her that I was sorry and I had no idea that she and the father are not on talking terms and I was unaware that he wasnt going to tell her. I did not make her madder at him and make her transfer that anger but I got to the bottom of the problem. By the end of that four hour conversation we were pretty happy. Now I have her phone number and we are going out next week! Planned: February 13, 2011: I had a family get together tonight. I got together with my mother, 2 sisters, their boyfriends, my son, and my little brother. As my mother usually does she started talking about my husband and I was offended but I listened to her. I had planned out a little of what I was going to say and I think I did fairly well. Tonight she was talking about how I should get a divorce because he is no good. Then she started talking about how she met this guy that would make me happier. I told her that I am happy with my husband and I know she only wants the best for me but she really doesnt even know what I like in a person so she cant decide who will be a good match for me. I stayed calm, listened to what she was saying, I also had my notes memorized so that I could show how I really felt without getting upset. I n terpersonal Communication CCC 4 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS Unplanned: February 19, 2011 Today my husband off took work early to go look at a car that I really like. We looked at the car, then came home. He said he had to go get something from a friends house. Then he was gone for over three hours. He was just supposed to pick something up. I had things that I needed to do like feed my mother in laws cats and let out her dog. She is out of town and she wanted to have us take care of them. He was so busy over at his friends house that he didnt realize what time it was. He also didnt think about the fact that I might have to do things today. Finally when he did get home I wasnt upset I had calmed down and I had rehearsed in my head what I was going to say. I told him that he should go to his mothers house and feed the cats, let the dog out, clean the litter box, and make sure they didnt potty in the house. This didnt end up happening but it made me feel better. I wasnt upset but this was my way of not being upset. He could not do this because his friends were coming over to work on his car. Planned: Sunday February 20, 2011 Tonight my husbands friends came over for a barbecue and I had to work on homework and my house was a mess. My husband does not help me clean the house so I asked him for his help. He told me he had to work on his car and I was needed to barbecue, clean, and entertain. I am not the hostess type but I did it and in return my husband is going to replace my brakes and rotors next week. Honestly it may be the wrong way to have a marriage but I do not mind entertaining his friends at the cost of him replacing my brakes and rotors on my new car. This is a planned event because we had scheduled it but I was not aware that I would be using my new behavior traits. I n terpersonal Communication CCC 5 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS 7B. Evaluation Evaluate your performance each time you attempt your new behavior in new situations. What seemed to work for you? The behaviors that seemed to work for me were the trading. Meaning that I entertained my husbands friends tonight and he changes me rotors and brakes next week. Also I enjoyed being able to listen and understand what was being said. What did not seem to work? After doing this exercise I found that the one thing that really doesnt work for me is when I turned around to walk away my husband got upset with me. In what situations were you most successful? I had a few situations where I was successful. I was successful when I had to deal with the event on January 20, 2011, I also felt like I was successful with the event on February 19, 2011 and February 13, 2011, and February 12, 2011. I thought that these events that were planned and the ones that were not turned out well and I was satisfied and I felt these events were very successful. What behaviors would you like to perform again? I would like to perform most of my behaviors that worked for me in the exercise. I liked how I worked with my mother keeping my calm while speaking with her and listening to what she had to say even though it wasnt exactly what I wanted to hear. Also I liked that I was able to calm myself down while thinking of what I was going to say to my husband when he came home hours after he was supposed to be home from his friends house. What will you do differently the next time? I n terpersonal Communication CCC 6 I NTERPERSONAL COMMUN ICATION WEEK 7 PLANNED AND UNPLANNED E VENTS Next time my husband gets mad at me and I know about it I think that I will talk to him before he goes off. I think that talking to him before he gets upset is the best situation. Because I know that the situation could have been a lot worse and luckily it wasnt but sometimes situations have been known to escalate from being bad to worse. Not ever violent in my relationship but from angry to angrier.
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