summary Analytical Rhet 102 T, Th 9:30-10:45 am 1/31/08
How Modernized Families View the Traditional Family
The purpose of Stephanie Coontz's "The Way We Wish We Were: Defining the Family Crisis" is to display how times have changed and how family habits are less traditional. The article pinpoints both the negative and positive aspects of both the traditional and nuclear families. Many American families have various family values, which makes present family-life more modern and diverse. The diversity of their values diminish as they try to become a "traditional family" if it is not their typical lifestyle. Traditional families seem to be the type of families that existed in the past, often relating back to the "golden age" and television shows such as "Leave it to Beaver." Nuclear families appear to be the more present-day type of families, where the lines of authority are not as clear and parent-child relationships are more modern than before. The change that current families wish to make is to go back in time to their ideal traditional family. More often than not, Americans wish for a more traditional family simply because of the strict family authority the head of the family is given. However, all the other aspects of the specific traditional family chosen do not typically appeal to them. For example, eighteenth century colonial families were known for the father's strict authority and the women and children's discipline, but did not care to shelter young children from knowledge of sexuality. Many American families today would not go for that. The Victorian family depended on their child's labor and sent children as young as six work to twelve-hour shifts. We think of traditional family-life as the "perfect" way it appears inside the home rather than reflecting on the hardships they suffered.
Family trends have changed vastly over time, so it is hard to find a specific example of the traditional family. Many people have negative opinions of family-life and how it has changed. One example is that parent-child bonds have fallen because nuclear families are freer and have less control and contact in daily life. In reality, this is false because mortality rates are lower, proving that parent-child relationships are still very strong and possibly stronger than they were 50 years ago. Going along with mortality rates, modern studies show divorce rates have increased over the years. This is only true because mortality rates were so high during the colonial times that the typical marriage length was less than twelve years. People died at earlier ages back then, which caused marriages to end by death, rather than divorce. To assess the changes in family trends, we cannot be closed-minded about past or present values because we must think of the conditions and era each type of family lived in. There is a conflict in Americans as to how they individually feel about their own familylife. Too many myths of the past have portrayed traditional families and values as negative. Modern families impose wrong overviews of past family-life, as they wish to install a specific family model in their own family. Instead, Americans should look at their own family values and compare them to the values of the past to see how consequences of certain actions have shaped our values over time to what they are today.