fairfighting02 - emotional reaction from you That is when...

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Fair Fighting I. Basic skills A. Editing 1. take a pause 2. remember, “words hurt deeply” 3. discuss what you’ve thought about Determine problem behavior Decide the value of the fight Decide if the person can change Describe the problem (problem, feelings, outcomes)
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B. Leveling 1. Be clear and specific 2. Watch assumptions intention vs. consequence 3. Avoid excuses 4. Be present focused 5. Don’t fear losing 6. Practice conflict reduction skills
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Establish Common Ground by Setting Ground Rules Establish Common Ground by Emphasizing Commonalities Fractionate Reframe Your Language (Avoid adversarial language) Reframe Your Complaints Into Requests Reframe Into Super-ordinate Goals Resist Counter-arguing Start with points of agreement
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Check each of the words below that gets and
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Unformatted text preview: emotional reaction from you. That is, when you see or hear these words, you react in a less than neutral manner. _ You Should _ You’ve Failed _ You’re Lazy _ Why Can’t You _ You Must _ You Do This All The Time _ What You Need Is _ You Never _ You Claim _ You Always _ Thoughtless _ You Have To _ Every Time You _ Do It Now _ You Work For Me C. Assertiveness 1. assertiveness vs. aggressiveness 2. methods • “broken record” technique • don’t assume blame • don’t over-apologize • feel free to change • don’t fear “I don’t know” D. Responses to assertiveness 1. Positive 2. Negative – mumbling/backbiting – aggressiveness – psychosomatic responses – over apologize – revenge – guilt...
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fairfighting02 - emotional reaction from you That is when...

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