negotiating 2 - II. The Method Chapter 2 Separate the...

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II. The Method Chapter 2 – Separate the People from the Problem Negotiators are people first (18) Representatives from both sides have deeply held values, emotions, and different backgrounds and viewpoints; they are also unpredictable The human aspect of negotiation can be hurtful or helpful Every negotiator has two kinds of interests: in the substance and in the relationship (19) The relationship tends to become entangled with the problem – we tend to treat people and the problem as one Positional bargaining puts relationship and substance in conflict Separate the relationship from the substance; deal directly with the people problem (21) Base the relationship on accurate perceptions, clear communication, appropriate emotions and a forward-looking, purposive outlook Perception (22) Understanding the other side’s thinking is not simply a useful activity that will help you solve your problem – their thinking is the problem Conflict lies not in objective reality, but in people’s heads As useful as looking for objective reality can be, it is ultimately the reality as each side sees it that constitutes the problem in a negotiation and opens the way to a solution (23) Put yourself in their shoes – one of the most important skills a negotiator can have Understanding their point of view doesn’t mean you have to agree with it
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negotiating 2 - II. The Method Chapter 2 Separate the...

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