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Healthy Communication and Sexual Behavior Techniques

Healthy Communication and Sexual Behavior Techniques -...

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Healthy Communication and Sexual Behavior Techniques Gender differences Men perceive more sexual intent in casual interactions. Women are more likely to be unenthusiastic participant in sexual encounters. Women will desist from attempts to initiate sex after being put down/rebuffed. Men are more likely to persist. Levinger – The ABCDE’s of Relationships Attraction – first impressions (halo effect – someone is attractive so you think that everything about them is WONDERFUL), small talk, flirting, opening lines Building – moving beyond the superficial, talking about sex, trust, gay and lesbian relationships must rely on identifying factors Continuation – relationship continues to build, couple grows together Deterioration Ending – relationship ends, if you end the relationship beware of rebound relationships 2 types of communication problems in relationships: failure to trust, poor communication Early Christian writers limited appropriate sex to procreative acts in heterosexual marriage. Many states have laws prohibiting any other sexual acts besides penile-vaginal intercourse. Jocelyn Elders was removed from post as Surgeon General for saying masturbation is a part of human sexuality that perhaps should be taught. Most people in the US masturbate at some time. 80% of men and 70% of women reported engaging in fellatio last year. 75% of women and 80% of men reported engaging in cunnilingus in the last year. 10% reported engaging in anal sex in the last year. Variety of times/ways that sex is incorporated into relationships. Experimentation and frequency typically declines with time spent in relationship. Satisfaction doesn’t necessarily decrease. Attention, nurturing, commitment and effective communication for satisfying sex life also promote relationship health. Sexual acts require verbal and non-verbal communication. Partners who have similar preferences and dislikes have easier time with sexual communication. Feelings about sex are difficult to express because of cultural taboos. Fear of rejection, hurt and embarrassment elevated in sexual matters. Phrases like “sleeping together” show how culture may impede directness. Ambiguous terminology makes transmission of specifics difficult. Communication the thread that connects sexuality and intimacy
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Involves conveying symbols: words, facial expressions, movements, body language Talking about sex Sexual scripts: myth of male sexual omniscience, myth of the magic of silent sex Sex guilt: may feel ‘dirty’ if they talk about sex, Charlie and Martha Shedd “celebration in the bedroom” Sexually fulfilled partners are comfortable expressing what they enjoy and do not enjoy during sex
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