Men and Women in Conversation_Notes

Men and Women in Conversation_Notes - often taken literally...

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Men and Women in Conversation- Deborah Tannen Men and women have different ways of speaking  Apologies For many women, saying “I’m sorry” isn’t necessarily an apology—it  is a ritual way of restoring balance to a conversation  Women uttered the most apologies to other women and far fewer to  men, while men uttered very few to other men and slightly more to  women  o Criticism Cut and dry criticisms are different than criticisms that are prefaced  by softeners  Men are more prone to cut and dry, women to the use of softeners  o Thank You People often expect thank you’s to be returned When a ritual thank you is not reciprocated, feelings can be hurt Usually women are the only ones to get their panties in a twist about  such a stupid thing  o Ritual Fighting Whereas the above example are common rituals among women 
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Unformatted text preview: often taken literally by men, ritual opposition is the opposite o Giving Praise Women want positive reinforcement more than men Men tend to be more okay with being left along and trusted than being micromanaged, women often do not like this style o Complaining as Solidarity Women complain to complain, and men misinterpret this complaining for a request to solve the problem Women can feel that men are being condescending by looking for a solution o Jokes Men prefer humor based on razzing, teasing, and mock-hostile actions, whereas women tend to engage in self-deprecation Women often mistake mens humor for general hostility, men often mistake womens humor for truly putting themselves down...
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