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Unformatted text preview: Non Verbal Non Verbal Communication & Strategic Business Communication “Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent” – Victor Hugo “Nonverbal communication is the music (and perhaps dance) of language” – Dr. Werber It expresses, enhances, clarifies, emphasizes, conveys It can also confuse, complicate and betray us as well. Today we will…………… Today we will……………
Learn how to get people’s attention using nonverbal communication Learn how to better understand (i.e., pay attention to) people’s nonverbal communication Learn about the strategic uses of nonverbal communication Place you in a variety of situations which will heighten your selfawareness and nonverbal skills Just How Important Is Non Verbal Just How Important Is Non Verbal Communication? Ask Al Gore You can lose elections……… “Gore Frustrated” Video George W. Bush Video Under Attack, but in control of His Non Verbal Communication Nonverbal Behavior…. Nonverbal Behavior….
Accounts for 65% - 93% of the total meaning of communication The Importance of Non Verbal Communication
When nonverbal and When nonverbal and verbal messages are inconsistent ….. ..which do we believe? We believe the nonverbal We believe the nonverbal
“Kerry Nodding” Video A “Kerry Nodding” Video B Strategic Uses of Non Verbal Strategic Uses of Non Verbal Communication in Organizations – Getting Their Attention “The Attention Deficit Economy”
people feel more distracted than ever Attention becomes a scarce resource TV channels/Magazines/Web/Email/OnLine Social Networks Leads to Instant impressions! Distrust (Who is credible?) – e.g., buy So, with so much information out So, with so much information out there, the key question is …. HOW DO WE GET THE ATTENTION OF OTHERS? e.g., our customers, interviewers, bosses, etc. Two common ways One key aspect of strategic communication is non verbal communication Via strategic communication (to get their attention) Via strategic communication (by paying attention to them, and thus getting their attention) Paralanguage Kinesics (body motion) Silence Proxemics and personal space Haptics (touch) Physical appearance Everything Environmental factors except the Chronemics (time) words! Getting/Paying Attention Via Getting/Paying Attention Via Nonverbal Communication WarmUp Activity (Nonverbal Role WarmUp Activity (Nonverbal Role Play) Communicating Without Words Objective Establish importance of nonverbal communication in expressing 3 key dimensions of relational meaning Liking Power Responsiveness Ways to Get People’s Attention in a Busy Ways to Get People’s Attention in a Busy Corporate Environment Paralanguage: Communication that is vocal but that does not use words themselves Sounds (gasps and murmurs) Vocal qualities How we pronounce words The accents we use Complexity of our sentences Volume Rhythm Pitch Inflection Ways to Get People’s Attention in Ways to Get People’s Attention in a Busy Corporate Environment Strategic use of paralanguage Paralanguage & Passion Speak with intention Let others know you believe it Passion Nixon/Clinton Video – same topic/different tone MLK Video Ways to Get People’s Attention in Ways to Get People’s Attention in a Busy Corporate Environment Paralanguage & Passion “(Un)Controlled” Passion – be careful in business/political contexts Sports context…. “Over the Top” Video (Howard Dean) Practice Paralanguage Practice Paralanguage Say “Really” so it means Say “Word” so it means I don’t believe you Wow! That’s amazing. That doesn’t square with what I have heard. I totally agree Are you serious? No way. That’s cool. Right. I agree. Paralanguage Paralanguage How many different meanings? “I didn’t say she beat her husband.” Ways to Get People’s Attention in a Busy Ways to Get People’s Attention in a Busy Corporate Environment – Kinesics (Body Movement) Use and pay attention to the eyes Attention Kinesics = Body Movement Kinesics = Body Movement
Eyes – “The mirrors of the soul” We tend to look at eyes to judge People react positively to pupil dilatation Eye Contact – Controlling the Eye Contact – Controlling the Interaction Attraction; babies react positively to pupil dilation Larger, dilated pupils are seen as more attractive than smaller, contracted pupils We like those who like us “Faking your body” when talking and listening Job Interviews Smiling, Gaze, Body Movement Sales, Public Speaking, Meetings Kinesics (Cont.) Kinesics (Cont.) Intentional/Strategic Movement Move & Gesture with economy, purpose Not lots of wasted motion Interviews Fortune 500 Example (the simple nod) Get organized before, composure, not fidgety with pens, papers, etc. SNL Video Kinesics (Cont.) Kinesics (Cont.) Posture Can signal selfassurance – lean toward person Can tell others if we are open/closed to interaction (e.g., uncrossing of legs, arms closed, downward gaze) Can signal a lack of confidence (e.g., shoulder slump) Body Symmetry Military Asymmetrical Posture Signals Confidence/Rated Positively Kinesics and Job Interviews Kinesics and Job Interviews “The best way to access an executive's managerial potential is not to listen to what he has to say, but to observe what he does when he is saying it. This is the new behavioral science ‘movement analysis.’” (W. Lamb) Forward and Backward Movements: Extend a hand straight forward during an interview or tend to lean forward – FIRM handshake impt You are an "operator" good for an organization requiring an infusion of energy or dramatic change of course. Kinesics and Job Interviews (Cont.) Kinesics and Job Interviews (Cont.) Vertical Movements: If you tend to draw yourself up to your tallest during the handshake, you are a "presenter." You are a master at selling yourself or the organization in which you are employed. SidetoSide Movements: If you take a lot of space while talking by moving your arms about, you are a good informer and good listener. Best suited for an organization seeking a better sense of direction. Rehearsal is helpful, but in general gestures must come naturally. Silence Silence Silence can be comforting…. when intimates are so close they do not need to talk when there is an absence of disturbing noise Silence can be a disconfirming symbol…. when you talk to someone and they do not reply when employees are disciplined by being ignored Silence can also be a very helpful tool in strategic communication – e.g., public speaking Getting Others’ Attention Getting Others’ Attention Pairs Activity First talk about something that you REALLY care about quite deeply (family member, religion, etc.) Then, using these same feelings, FAKE your body into believing about the next thing you will talk about: REAL ESTATE
Take a position on whether you think the market will go up or down over the next several years Widen your eyes, use techniques of posture, paralanguage, silence, etc. Switch roles Ideas for dialogue…….next slide……… 1. (down) Prices are disconnected from fundamentals. House prices are far beyond any historically known relationship to rents or salaries. Rents are less than half of mortgage payments. Salaries cannot cover mortgages except in the very short term by using adjustable interestonly loans. (down) Foreclosures will continue for the next year. (down) The flood of risky "home equity loans.“ (down) Speculators are sitting on the sidelines. (up) Prices are down and will attract new buyers soon. (up) Historically safer than other investment vehicles (up) Under supply of housing/scarcity of land Non Verbal Communication: Real Estate Non Verbal Communication: Real Estate Dialogue Poker: An Illustrative Example Poker: An Illustrative Example
“A tell” = a tell is a detectable change in a player's behavior that gives clues to that player's assessment of their hand. Eye Contact Poker (Continued) Poker (Continued) Many pros wear sunglasses or visors/caps when playing; the eyes rarely lie Big cards stare at cards longer (BIZ consider…new salary offer, etc.) Steal pot – player may look to his/her left to see if the remaining players, who haven't yet acted, have quickly glanced at their cards and are likely to fold Facial Expression Unhappiness/ weak hand; show of confidence/ strong hand Body tics Weak is Strong/Strong is Weak Players like to be actors/when have a monster hand, tend to look disinterested (BIZ consider sales deals, etc.) “Oh, is it my turn to act" or "Oh I guess I will play these cards". Anxiety Physical changes (e.g., flexing of muscles, eye pupil dilation, palpitating heart rate, dry throat). Big hand Typically ready for confrontation and…. Chest may expand abnormally Players voice become slightly higher as (s)he makes a comment. Some of the top players in the game will stare at the vein on the topside of your forehead for blood pressure changes. Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks (Paying Attention)
Blinking (can mean lying) Rubbing the nose (can mean lying) Pupil dilation (can mean lying) Bush Sr. and Kerry Videos Nonverbal leaks in the courtroom Pretend you are sitting in the courtroom and about to testify. Raise your right hand and say “I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me God.” Keep your hand raised. Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks (Paying Attention) Nonverbal leaks in the courtroom Hand straight up, fingers wide apart Hand straight up, fingers tight together Hand bent forward Two fingers together, two fingers apart Hand bent backward Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks (Paying Attention) Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks Kinesics and Non Verbal Leaks Hand straight up, fingers wide apart you are rigid, terrified and will tell the truth Hand straight up, fingers tight together will tell the truth, but we will have to pull out of you (analytical honesty) Hand bent forward will probably try to lie Two fingers together, two fingers apart Star Trek Hand bent backward will bend over backwards to get you to believe them, but will probably lie Other Strategic Uses of Non Verbal Communication Proxemics and Personal Space Proxemics and Personal Space Every culture has norms for using space. In the U.S. we interact with acquaintances from 8’ to 12’ (public), 4’ to 8’ (social), 2’ to 4’ (personal), and 24” or less for very close friends or intimates. In China families often share bathrooms and kitchens with other families. Space Can Be Strategically Used To Even Out or Space Can Be Strategically Used To Even Out or Gain Power Do you want to even out power? seek out neutral territory Negotiation. Whose office is better? On your turf or theirs? Your office? I can read your nonverbals You are relaxed If I want to show power, intimidate My office? Space Can Be Strategically Used To Show Power Space Can Be Strategically Used To Show Power Do you want to show power? Greater space is often assumed by those with higher status. The higher your position (status) in the organization, the more and better space you will have the better protected your territory will be – lines of defense before they reach you “Taking Over the Room” Proxemics & Office Dynamics Proxemics & Office Dynamics How you identify your personal space and use the environment in which you find yourself influences your ability to send or receive messages.
How close do you stand to the one with whom you are communicating ? Where do you sit in the room? How do you position yourself with respect to others at a meeting? Space Can Be Strategically Used to Space Can Be Strategically Used to Increase/Decrease Distance How people arrange space reflects how close they are and whether they want interaction. Restaurants can arrange seating to encourage people to spend time or to eat quickly and leave. Reception areas in companies – messages conveyed? Furniture arranged comfortably and close invites conversation. Offices with open seating (rather than a desk separating people) invites interaction. Proxemics and Managing Staff Proxemics and Managing Staff Strategic Managing Minimize status gap between you and subordinates by including comfortable or easy chair in office Promote informal communication with subordinates by Visiting employees in THEIR offices Space Can Be Strategically Used To Space Can Be Strategically Used To Gain Power Those with power often invade others’ territory. Subconsciously Consciously (don’t knock on door, look in file cabinets) Consider effect on morale Gore Turf Video Bush Turf Video Haptics (Touch) Can Be Strategically Haptics (Touch) Can Be Strategically Used to Persuade and/or Show Power Touching and being touched are essential to a healthy life. Touch can communicate power and status. Women tend to touch to show liking, while men often use touch to exert power. Who Touches the Most?
Doctor or patient? Manager or worker? Police officer or accused? Business executive or secretary? Teacher or student? The higher status person is The higher status person is usually permitted to touch the lowerstatus person.
What implications does this behavior have? How can haptics assist us in public speaking? Physical Appearance Physical Appearance
What message do you wish to send with your choice of clothing and personal grooming? Dress and Approachability Dress and Approachability Boeing CEO Philip Conduit Discussions hard to get going with subordinates when wearing suit and tie – switched to more causal when making trips to the shop floor, etc. Washington, DC – most conservative, then New York and Philadelphia California and New England (many high tech companies) – least conservative (2001 study) Geography Dress for Success in Business Dress for Success in Business Colors most appropriate for business settings Black, brown, navy, grey, beige Darker colors associated with higher status and greater authority – wearing these colors may increase others’ perceptions of your rank (Greenleaf, 1988) “Splash” of colors may indicate confidence Need Help? Need Help?
www.dressingwell.com http://www.casualpower.com “Business Casual” Culture of particular company most important driver of choice
Many companies going after younger workers by not having dress codes Ties as counterculture…(Tie Tuesday) Environmental Factors Environmental Factors Elements of settings that affect how we feel and act
Architecture Colors Temperature Sounds Smells Lighting Power locations of desks Environmental Factors Environmental Factors Temperature of room How close to boss’ desk? In dark corner? Window/corner office – status As temp goes up in office/room, impressions of speaker’s attractiveness decline implications for where schedule presentations/meetings, etc. 10% of patients at ease when talking with doctor across desk, while 55% percent were at ease when desk removed (P. Manning) Furniture Managers – implications for increasing comm Chronemics (Time) Chronemics (Time) How do we manage and react to others’ management of time Duration Activity Punctuality American negotiators place great importance on time; being prompt, meeting deadlines, and using time efficiently. This emphasis on time may translate into impatience. Microsoft Photo Chronemics Chronemics Status – important people keep others’ waiting (Henley, 1977) People with low status expected to be punctual bosses can come late to meetings/not subordinates Managers spend more time with employees who they perceive have executive potential Classes (5075 minutes; begin closing books) Reading Nonverbals for Business Reading Nonverbals for Business
Gesture Forward lean Direct eye contact In Moderate Form When Exaggerated Friendly feelings Friendly feelings Hostile feelings Hostile feelings Rebelliousness Hostility Nervousness, anxiety, insecurity Unique dress and Creativity style Upright posture Expertise; selfconfidence Variability in Lively mind voice, pitch, rate, and loudness Reading Nonverbals for Business Reading Nonverbals for Business
Smiling Friendliness, Masking hostility, relaxed, and submissiveness secure composure Shyness, modesty Guilt, unreliability Involvement Self-confidence Hostility Uncertainty Averting gaze Knitted brow Nodding and reaching out the hands while talking From www.cba.uni.edu Nonverbal Activity Nonverbal Activity
Meaning Between Words (Uncertain Dialogue) Objective: Importance of nonverbals, paralanguage, and vocal cues Concept Greeting Culture & Nonverbal Messages Culture & Nonverbal Messages
North America Other Countries Firm handshake Respectful bow; Japan Kisses on the cheek; some European and Middle Eastern cultures Disrespectful; Japan Interested; aware; France, Brazil Doesn’t matter; Central America and Middle Eastern cultures Eye contact Staring Punctuality Shows confidence, trust Rude; aggressive Courteous; time is money Physical contact Okay to slap on the No physical contact among back or put friendly business associates; Japan arm around someone How Might Other Cultures React How Might Other Cultures React to These Nonverbal Messages? Nodding head up and down Maintaining consistent eye contact Forming a circle with forefinger and thumb Observing personal space (distance between people in conversation) Respecting attitude toward time (e.g., prompt or late for appointments) Allowing sole of shoe to be visible Cultural Reactions to Cultural Reactions to Nonverbal Messages
Nodding head up and down U.S.: Agreement Eastern Europe: Disagreement; side-to-side movement indicates agreement. Eye contact U.S.: Interested, involved Asian and others: Disrespectful Forefinger and thumb forming circle U.S.: Okay Japan: Money France: Zero Brazil: Vulgarity Personal space U.S.: 2–3 feet (casual); 4–12 feet (business) Other countries: Much closer Time U.S.: Time is money; punctuality expected. Mexico: Time not perceived to have value; frequently late for appointments. Sole of shoe visible U.S.: Unimportant Arab countries: Insulting because foot has touched unclean ground. ...
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- Spring '07