PSYC 333 Module 5.docx - PSYC 333 Human Sexuality(Module 5...

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PSYC 333 Human Sexuality (Module 5) Sexual Communication - Process where intimate partners share their sexual likes and dislikes with each other and negotiate sexuality in their relationship Communication in Intimate Relationships - Couples communication ongoing verbal, behavioural, and affective exchanges between partners (emotional exchanges between partners) - There are many definitions of communication Couples Communication Behaviours - Distress vs. Non-distressed couples Distressed couples engage in more negative behaviours and fewer positive behaviours (lower levels of validation and empathy toward each other) - 4 negative behaviours (predictors of decline in relationship satisfaction) – according to John Gottman (four horsemen of the Apocalypse) 1. Criticism (ad hominem attack) Hurtful because it involves attacking/criticizing a person’s character/personality instead of addressing the issue at hand 2. Contempt One step further from criticism Putting down and disrespecting one’s partner Disrespect for the person you’re talking about on top of criticism (attitude of superiority) EX: eye rolls, name calling, mean humour 3. Defensiveness Happens when one partner feels they are being attacked and need to protect themselves by denying responsibilities (no I don’t do that), making excuses or counter-complaining (well you did it too) 4. Stonewalling Happens when someone refuses to engage in the discussion at hand Disengaging from a conflict can be good if both parties agree to end the conflict for the time being Shutting down when in conflict (85% happens with males) But stonewalling is action taken by one person that has experienced negativity from their partner Non-verbal Communication - Verbal behaviour is almost always accompanied by non-verbal communication EX: curling of lips, dismissive tone of voice, shrug of shoulder - Pre-dominant way where people communicate with non-verbal communication - Quality of this communication is a stronger predictor of relationship satisfaction compared to the quality of verbal communication - Contempt example “I couldn’t care less what you think” - Very important and most common communication - If you communicate something non-verbally that was verbally, person is most likely to believe your non-verbal signals - Accounts for 60-65% of exchanged information - Guerro and Floyd studying non-verbal communication can help learn about intimacy Patterns of Couples Communication
- Negative reciprocity communication pattern where both partners tend to respond with negative comments or behaviours which just makes the conflict worse (escalating) Once this happens, it gets more difficult to end the conflict - Demand-withdraw communication pattern where one of the partners pressures the other (nagging to do something) and the other being pressures gets defensive or doesn’t engage The more one pushes, the more likely the other is to withdraw They will begin to grow more distant

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