*Writers Block Related Post*Okay, so this is where you get to see exactly what happens when I develop writer’s block. I have a project I’m working on and right now, the words simply don’t want to come. When that happens, I’ve got one sure-fire method that never seems to fail.I write 100 words every 15 minutes.That’s it. 100 words…fifteen minutes.That comes out to about 7 words a minute. Period.7 freaking words a minute.Usually, what I’ll do is spit out those 100 words, and then spend some time working on something else entirely.I have two computers set up – one for the project I’m working on and one for the shit that I’m going to use to entertain myself while I ignore the shit I should be working on.So, I’m going to pause for a minute, write my hundred words, and then comeback here and post some stuff that doesn’t require me to do any thinking whatsoever.***The gorgeous blonde stretched luxuriously beneath the silk sheets, letting out a little sigh of contentment. She glanced over at the man beside her.She’d never met anyone like him – smooth, confident, and with an almost Oriental intensity not normally found in an insurance investigator.He opened his eyes and gave her a lazy smile.“Hey,” he said.“Hey.”She reached for him, then, but before too much began to happen, his phone rang.“One minute,” he said, holding up a hand. “I’ve got to take this.”***“Shao here.”“Combs.”Matt Shao, Oriental insurance investigator, sat bolt upright.“Yes, sir. What can I do for you?”“A situation’s arisen and we could use your help. Are you busy?”Shao glanced at the woman beside him. She gave him the slightest of smiles and slowly lowered the sheet.He took a deep breath and sighed.“Well, to be honest, sir, I was in the middle of – ““I’ll see you at Headquarters ASAP.”The line went dead.“Sorry, honey,” Shao said, getting out of bed, “but I’ve got to get to work.”“Insurance work at this hour?”He shook his head.
“More important than insurance, honey – Writers’ Group work.”***THEME SONG: “Matt Shao”Matt Shao…He’s the man, the man who you need now…He is Matt Shao…He’s the one…The one with some top shelf puns…And he’s such fun…Buxom brunettes are attracted to himAnd some others go out on a limbTo him, lovemaking’s a whim…But when writing problems ariseHe’s called upon by others so wiseFor he’s a master of disguise…Matt Shao…Matt Shao…Matt Shao…(slow fade out, then a loud)MATT SHAO!***When Shao entered HQ, he was met by an attractive brunette. He gave her his patent pending “Shao smile.” “Ah, Miss Buxom Lovely. How are you?”She slapped him.Hard.“The name’s Brianna, asshole. What the hell is your problem?”“What makes you think I have a problem?”“I think you’re the creepy guy who keeps sending me dick pics in emails labelled ‘For Your Eyes Only.’”He shook his head.