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essay 1 revision sheet

essay 1 revision sheet - bunch of different sentence rules...

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Cecilia Li Professor Powell ENRU 1100 2 February 2009 1. I changed my entire essay because the first copy did not sufficiently answer your essay question. In this revision, I answered picked specific rules from the Bedford, as opposed to being vague about it. The new rules that I picked out are on pages 207 and 279. These rules are specific rules from the Bedford, since you told me that my last rules were not from the Bedford and were too vague. 2. I added some needed words to my essay. I used the phrase “This is mind” in the first essay I wrote, but left out the word “With”. Adding “with” makes this sentence more effective because it doesn’t make complete sense without it. 3. I removed some of my points that did not make the essay flow logically. I listed a
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Unformatted text preview: bunch of different sentence rules in my previous essay. This revision improved my essay by eliminating general discussion of rules because now I am only talking about one rule, which is what you’re looking for. In the original essay, I wrote “This also includes using active verbs, not omitting needed words, using proper modifiers, emphasizing what is intended, and having variety in what is said or written.” In this revised essay, I wrote “The most important rule is to avoid ambiguous or remote pronoun reference.” I gave many reasons as to why this rule is important in the sentences that follow....
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