Suman Notes Weeks 1-5

Suman Notes Weeks 1-5 - Comm 10 Weeks 1-5 Communication...

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Comm 10: Weeks 1-5 Communication Studies = social science -explains and help us understand human behavior -interdisciplinary social science (borrows from other sciences) ie psychology, anthropology, linguistics, history -borrows most from sociology What we learn from Soc -communications follows certain social rules (norms) -dating norms -discipline that deals with the lived experience of everyday life -lives are guided by norms (interpersonal/mass comm) mass-what media to use and how to use it interpersonal-how to use comm in our day to day life Norms = social rules -what behavior is acceptable in any given situation -what is expected -different types: some stronger than others 1. Folkways : social rules to which people generally concern, but receive little pressure to do so (ex: speak to someone when you’re introduced, wear matching socks, don’t wear holed clothing, don’t wear tuxedos to go to McDonalds) -BUT if you DO, it’s no big deal (you’re just strange) 2. Mores : breaking a more brings about a bigger reaction -many written into law -serious norm (ex.: blowing up a building, desecrating a temple) 3. Taboos : Strongest held norm (not even in law ‘cause it’s so strong -(ex: don’t communicate affection to close family members – incest) -viceral, negative reaction -folkways most common -norms guide communication decisions/actions -norms are NOT set in stone (they change from time to time) -considerable variation for different groups of people (cultures, individuals, etc..) Dating Norms -normally male calls female, but changed now for female calling male
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-after you get phone number, how many days should you wait before calling (what do norms tell you?) 3 days is norm - reason : if you do it too soon, you’re overeager/desperate if you wait too long, you’re disinterested jerk -what day of the week should you call for a weekend date? Don’t call later than Wednesday for a Friday date - what do you say in the phone call? - show you have a personality (ie humor, ambition) - after you go out, how often should you call? Should not call everyday -reason: you appear needy and dependent -How often should you call after sex? Everyday - How long should you talk? (sustained conversations show interest and concern) Let female end conversation first. -males have more trouble in keeping conversation than females -Listening is VERY important in communication -there is more anxiety if you get the phone number indirectly -a norm suggests you offer a couple of choices to get together -if other person is busy at all choices, the busy person should say such things as “oh thank” -if no alternatives are offered, there is a message that he/she is not interested -lots of indirectness -typically we are NOT DIRECT -normative to be NICE -normative to be GRACIOUS when rejected -Where you gonna go for first date? Movie/dinner -reason : give you two hours of not worrying about comm.
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