analcomm2 - Kacy Grady 810-79-8900 Relational Dialectics...

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Kacy Grady 810-79-8900 Relational Dialectics For my analysis paper, I chose to observe the close relationship of my best friend and her boyfriend. They have been dating for about two years and have just recently gotten engaged. We just spent the weekend in Breckenridge, where I had the opportunity to observe their behaviors within the relationship. I am going to use the relational dialectics of Baxter and Montgomery to help understand some of the tensions and struggles my friends encounter within their relationship. Dialectic refers to the tension people experience when they have two seemingly contradictory but connected needs. Maintaining close relationships is associated with the ability to manage these contradictory but connected needs. We spent the weekend in a condo with two bedrooms, one a master bedroom with a king size bed; the other was a bedroom with two queen size beds. The living room had a pullout couch, and a fireplace; the kitchen—a.k.a. the beer pong room—looked out over the mountains. Chasen and Laurie, the couple whose relationship I am studying, stayed in the master bedroom; Ian, Josh, and I shared the second bedroom, and Owen ended up on the couch. Overall, the layout of the place was great, enough for all of us not to be on top of one another. Baxter and Montgomery believed there to be three relational dialectics present in every close relationship. The first of these is the Integration/Separation dialectic. This tension refers to one’s need to connect with others and the simultaneous need to feel independent. During my observation of Chasen and Laurie’s relationship, I noticed that
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Kacy Grady 810-79-8900 each night, Laurie would go to bed early, leaving the rest of the group to keep partying. Apparently, when Laurie decides its time for bed, she expects Chasen to come with her,
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This note was uploaded on 03/14/2010 for the course COMM 1010 taught by Professor ? during the Spring '09 term at Colorado.

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analcomm2 - Kacy Grady 810-79-8900 Relational Dialectics...

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