blog - There is an old saying"without trust there is no...

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There is an old saying, "without trust, there is no love." Is this true? Well, one thing is for sure: love with trust lasts a lot longer than love without it. Are you struggling to find trust in your relationship? Losing trust for a partner is not uncommon. Events or personality differences treated the wrong way, will erode trust in our loved one. Insults, put-downs, disrespect, affairs, flirting (with others), mismanagement of business or money, and numerous other things will all contribute to losing trust. How do we build trust? How do we stop erosion and rebuild trust? The answer is ACCEPTANCE. Clickbank Sponsors: Great Sex from Oprah Dating Expert Wedding Planning Without The Stress Arrogant, foul-mouthed, Rich Jerk shares secrets for making #*@!loads of money. Blah, blah, blah, so what? It isn't as if certain behaviors are to be accepted, at all times, and just accepted. However, there is no basis for change or improvement without trust, and the only way to get someone to trust is to accept them for who they are. There are many differences between people in relationships. I have noticed, in my own relationships, that often, one person is tight with money, the other has a hole in their pocket; one is a stickler for being on time, the other slack and often late; one keeps a tidy house and likes dishes done and the bed made, the other leaves their clothes on the floor; one is a morning person, the other a night owl; one is great at coming up with ideas, the other better at implementing them. These differences go beyond the "opposites attract" theory. Being different is vital to a successful relationship, as these differences help us make up for what we lack. With our partner's strengths, we are a stronger couple than we are individually. However, when we put down our differences, and/or try to create a strength in our partner's area of lack, we convey disrespect -- because we are not accepting our partner for who they are. If one partner wants to be on time and values schedules, is it disrespectful for the other partner to be slack, if this is how they operate? Probably not. If one person wants to relax, but their partner wants to
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hurry them up to be on time to that party they were going to, is the person pushing being disrespectful? Probably not. Both are right, in a sense, as there is no absolute "right way" of doing these things. Imagine the likelihood to create change in a partner by using any of the following comments as a startup for conversation: "You're selfish." "You're disrespectful. Why can't you see that being on time matters to me?" "Where did my clothes go? I left them out to wear that again! Did you take them?" "How many times do I have to tell you or ask you. .." "Why are you just sitting there meditating? We have things to do today!" "Can't you see that I like a neat bed?" "What's more important, me or that football game on T.V.?" "You're so negative! Why can't you be more positive?"
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This note was uploaded on 03/21/2010 for the course KNOWLEDGE 5654 taught by Professor Mr.david during the Spring '10 term at IESE Business School.

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blog - There is an old saying"without trust there is no...

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