Dear Anthony Dilemma - that all managers are male. And the...

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Dear Anthony, Here is what I thought that maybe you could have wrote a little different. Nobody wants to offend another person weather it be face to face or in your class forum. The first thing I noticed was that you said she had “some good pointers.” Instead I would have said “ she made some really good points to her message.” That doesn’t come off offensive. Second thing I saw was that you mentioned that all the managers were male. The way you said it comes off really sexist. Instead I would have said something along the lines like “ I used some of the points she made later at a picnic where all the managers and their spouses were attending.” It doesn’t acenuate
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Unformatted text preview: that all managers are male. And the last thing I noticed was that you mentioned that any man that wants to advance in the business world should touch up on their etiquette. Instead say something along the lines that if anybody wants to advance in the business world should touch up on their etiquette. It just sounds better. Anthony, I know that you are a good guy. I hope that this helps you for your future reference. I have had to learn some of this myself and it is hard to change the way you write. Next time maybe read it to someone before you push the send button. Getting that second opinion helps a lot too! Hope this helps you. Mari Harbison...
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