AXES exercise - Each paragraph below is missing or...

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Each paragraph below is missing or insufficiently uses one of the four components of an effective paragraph: Assertion, eXamples (textual evidence), explanation, and significance. Only one paragraph contains all four components . As a group, examine each paragraph and determine the following: 1. Which component(s) is/are missing? 2. How would the missing component(s) strengthen the paragraph? 3. For the paragraph that contains all four components, how would you revise it to make it more effective? Example 1: The feelings and or emotions that Hoagland conveys are love. I believe he loves turtles because of his love for ponds. These turtles dwelled in the ponds that Hoagland loves so much therefore he was bound to fall in love with them sometime. Hoagland loves them so much that he has been encouraged to study them. Hoagland knows so much about these turtles that he can tell which type they are and he knows what to feed them. Hoagland can take care of them very well because of his knowledge. All because as a child he loved to visit ponds. Hoagland is such a lover of turtles that one day he was walking by a store which was selling painted turtles. He was so emotionally struck by this that he decided to ask if the store had any older turtles. He then decides to buy one and raise it. He fed it and cared for it. The one point that shows how much Hoagland loved turtles was at the time that he realized that the new turtle he bought could not survive in his situation. Hoagland was so moved that he decided to hide his pride and let
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This note was uploaded on 09/08/2010 for the course ENGL 1B at San Jose State.

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AXES exercise - Each paragraph below is missing or...

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