listening to hear, not to respond

listening to hear, not to respond - Listening to Hear 1...

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Unformatted text preview: Listening to Hear 1 Listening to Hear, Not to Respond Sheri Brown COM 200 Denise Greaves June 21, 2009 Listening to Hear 2 Listening To Hear, Not To Respond Have you ever listened to someone talk, and lose what they were saying because you were too focused on wanting to respond to their first sentence? Have you ever walked away from a discussion and thought that there was nothing gained, but the loss of time? People have different listening skills and communication can be very challenging when two parties are not receiving the messages intended. I was about one year old when I spoke my first word. I was about seventeen years old when I learned how to listen. I was in a debate class in high school when I learned I was not supposed to listen to respond. I was supposed to listen to hear, process the information, and then respond to what I heard. Debate class was the first formal introduction to active listening I received. As everything is a work in progress as we grow, listening skills are no exception. Active listening is more than hearing, processing and responding though. It is an intricate skill that is improved on as we grow. Active listening is committing your self intellectually and physically into a conversation. Communicating Effectively explains six steps that build active listening. (Hybels 2007 p.93-94) The first step is to identify the main idea that is being conversed. Like a well written essay, this would be the subject that is identified in the first paragraph. Second step of active listening is to form a mental outline. Based on the information given, find a direction that the speaker is going. This will help you understand the purpose of why the speaker is sharing the information. In finding the direction, and outline of the information, you will be able to predict what will come next. This is explained as step three. While the speaker is giving information, you may be able to relate with personal experiences. Listening to Hear 3 The fourth step is to find a relation between the information given and your own experiences. This will help form the response that the speaker is looking for, if it is based on getting information from you. Step five explains that before you are ready to give feedback, look for differences between the information given, and the information you know already. The information given may be particular in the way of gaining a response. The sixth and final step of active listening is to ask questions. This is important for two reasons. It will give the speaker confidence in your sincerity to listen, and to gain more fact based information to build a successful dialogue. Sometimes while we are participating in a conversation, we have internal conversations of our own. The book, Art of Listening , states that Our internal conversation filters everything we hear. Some internal filtering conversations include: What am I going to say next? Do I agree with you or not? All of these ways of listening are automatic and unconscious. (Cook, p. agree with you or not?...
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listening to hear, not to respond - Listening to Hear 1...

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