12 - conflict and violence

12 - conflict and violence - The Nature of Conflict 19:26...

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The Nature of Conflict 19:26 What Is Conflict? Interpersonal conflict: One person’s motives, goals, beliefs, opinions, or  behavior interfere with, or are incompatible with, those of another  o Conflict is born of dissimilarity  o Conflict occurs when one’s wishes or actions actually obstruct or impede  those of someone else  Conflict is inescapable for two reasons o Any two people will occasionally differ in their moods and preferences  Conflict is unavoidable because there are certain tensions that are woven into  the fabric of close relationships that will, sooner or later, always cause some  strain o Dialectics: Opposing motivations that can never be entirely satisfied  because they contradict each other  Continual tension between personal autonomy and connection to others o People often want to be free to do what they want  o People also seek warm, close connections to others that can make them  dependent on particular partners  o People experience contradiction from the simultaneous operation of drives  for both autonomy and connection to varying degrees  Tension between openness and closedness o People like their privacy o There’s candor and transparent authenticity o There’s discretion and restraint Friction between stability and change o People with pleasant partnerships will want to maintain and protect them  o People relish novelty and excitement  Dialectic tension between integration and separation from others outside  one’s partnership 
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The Frequency of Conflict Little children and their parents are often at odds o Adolescents encounter an average of seven disagreements per day in  their various relationships  o Dating couples report 2.3 conflicts per week o Many conflicts are never addressed Some people experience more conflict than other people do  Personality o People who are high in neuroticism worry a lot and are impulsive and  prone to anger People high in agreeableness, who are good-natured, cooperative, and  generally easy to get along with, probably experience fewer conflicts  because they compromise easily  Attachment style o People who are anxious over abandonment tend to fret that their partners  may leave them and they think that there is more conflict in their  relationships than their partners do  They consider conflict to be more damaging to the relationship than  their partners do  Stage of Life o Stereotypes suggests that teenagers have a lot of conflict with their  parents, but the frequency of conflict between parents and their children  declines as adolescents grow older  o Older married couples tend to have fewer disagreements than middle-
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This note was uploaded on 11/16/2010 for the course PSYC 334 taught by Professor Staff during the Spring '08 term at Maryland.

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12 - conflict and violence - The Nature of Conflict 19:26...

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