15 - maintaining and repairing relationships

15 - maintaining and repairing relationships - Maintaining...

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Maintaining and Enhancing Relationships 02:54 Relationship maintenance mechanisms: The strategic actions people take to  sustain their partnerships Investment model: Several behaviors that seem to follow from commitment to  a relationship Other actions that distinguish happy partners from those who are less content Staying Committed Cognitive Maintenance Mechanisms o They think of themselves not as separate individuals but as part of a  greater whole that includes them and their partners Cognitive interdependence: Perceiving greater overlap between their  partners’ lives and their own o Positive illusions: Idealizing each other and perceiving their relationship in  the best possible light  o Perceived superiority: Committed partners tend to think that their  relationships are better than most o Inattention to alternatives: Relatively uninterested and unaware of how well  they could be doing in alternative relationships o Derogation of tempting alternatives: Allows people to feel that other  potential partners are less attractive than the ones they already have  Behavioral Maintenance Mechanisms o Willingness to sacrifice: Committed people are often willing to make  various personal sacrifices Involves trivial costs, but can also involve substantial costs in which  people endure rather long periods of deprivation in order to preserve or  enrich their partnership o Michelangelo phenomenon: When our partners encourage us to e all that  we can be both our relationship and our personal well-being are enhanced Remain more committed to a relationship when their partners help  them become who they wish to be o Accommodation: The willingness to control the impulse to respond in kind  to a partner’s provocation and to instead respond constructively  Avoiding useless conflict that might merely perpetuate an aversive  interaction  o Play: Those that play together tend to stay together 
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Spouses who get up and go out feel that their marriages are of higher  quality than do those who just stay home o Forgiveness: Quickens the healing of both the relationship and the partner  who was wronged  Staying Content Contented partners try to foster positivity; they encourage openness and self-
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This note was uploaded on 11/16/2010 for the course PSYC 334 taught by Professor Staff during the Spring '08 term at Maryland.

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15 - maintaining and repairing relationships - Maintaining...

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