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Unformatted text preview: (comma splices, fragments, fused sentences, agreement, etc.) and spelling. 24/2 5 TOTAL 94/10 GRADE: A COMMENT: Lauren, This is a very successful genre letter. It illustrates how a particular form of writing (in this case the cover letter) can be autobiographical. Content: Your paper presents a coherent thesis. The strongest moments in the paper come in the form of appropriate, concrete details (for e.g. watching the sports channel as a kid). A few more of such evocative examples would have further strengthened the paper. Structure: The paper does a very thorough job of following the structure of a cover letter. It is coherent, clear and focused. There are no digressions from the central point. The transitions are successful, as are the introduction and conclusion. Mechanics: There are a few mechanical errors that I have corrected on the paper itself. Well done! (And I hope you get the internship! You certainly deserve it!)...
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- Spring '08