WK8DQ3 - rearrange many of her sentences as well as...

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After reading the sample essay on pages 34-39 of the essay guide, I did not find that Claire Alexander wrote an effective definition essay. There were many errors in her essay, such as grammar, missed words, and punctuation. The thesis statement was confusing and all around boring and lost my attention immediately. I had a difficult time reading through the entire essay. In the first and third paragraphs I do not think that they contributed to the topic sentences. In the second paragraph I seemed to be all over the place, it did not flow smoothly. In order for this essay to be effective she would need to
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Unformatted text preview: rearrange many of her sentences as well as distribute her paragraphs in a completely different order. If Claire would have used the first sentences in her conclusion “Adult education is most successful as the learner sees the relevance of the proffered information and skills, but adult learners bring experiential knowledge to the learning environment, so as life experiences are varied, so must the educational program avoid confinement to a single theory or philosophy.” It would have made a much better Introduction paragraph and may have gotten the readers attention....
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This note was uploaded on 01/25/2011 for the course COM 156 taught by Professor Hampton during the Spring '10 term at University of Phoenix.

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