Hyphen+Handout - the best looking man in the land! Ethal...

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The Self Doubting Damsel: A Cautionary Tale Once upon in a time, in the city state of Wydelia, which is in a little known part of the Jero Krymian Empire, there lived a melancholy young woman named Ethel. Ethel’s mother had passed away from a quasi obscure disease in her youth, and Ethel’s father, burdened by grief, had become a real stick in the mud. Thus Ethel spent most of her days alone, gazing up at the bluish gray sky, reading grammar and style manuals (the poetry of the day) and dreaming of love and success. One bright, cold day, there was much hubbub in the town square. The King of Wydelia had dispatched one of his pages (a singer songwriter by training, but since relegated to trumpeteering due to poor record sales) to make an announcement. “Hear ye, hear ye!” said the page after a mighty trumpet blast. “The King of Wydelia will be holding the Grand Grammar A Thon in a fortnight, and whoever wins shall have the hand of his son,
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Unformatted text preview: the best looking man in the land! Ethal was thrilled at the news. Although she was self educated, she had channeled her loneliness and other self nullifying behaviors into rigorous study. She was about to spring up and volunteer to compete, but then the thought of losing stopped her. After all my fathers been through, she said aloud, his heart wouldnt stand such a loss. Suddenly, the horse that was devouring oats beside her opened its mouth and spoke. Self doubt will be the death of you, Ethel! You should cultivate a devil may care attitude! Ethel was so shocked to hear the horse speak that she promptly signed up and sailed through the preliminaries. During the sudden death rounds, she beat a pig faced duchess named Lila because of her comprehensive knowledge of the hyphen. Ethel won the Grammar A Thon, married the Prince of Wydelia, and lived happily ever after. Moral: Hyphen-Savvy=Happy Endings...
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