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Unformatted text preview: Conflict Styles Styles And Tactics Defined
Style: patterned responses or clusters of behavior Tactic: individual moves used to carry out a style Styles and Attitudes Cautions About Styles Pure styles don’t exist Some styles offer tactics for other styles Perception of style depends on who is doing the rating We see ourselves more positively Style more related to role & power than gender People underreport avoidance and overreport collaboration Avoidance As A Style
Characterized By Denial Of The Conflict Changing And Avoiding Topics Joking Around Rather Than Dealing With The Issues Two Types Of Avoidance Two Types Of Avoidance
Consensual -- both parties agree to avoid conflict Nonconsensual -- only one party wants to avoid nonconsensual avoidance is more destructive Twin Cycles Of Avoidance: Twin Cycles Of Avoidance:
Avoid - Avoid
Avoidance Issues Not Addressed More Avoidance Issues Not Resolved Twin Cycles Of Avoidance: Twin Cycles Of Avoidance:
Avoid – Escalate- Avoid
Avoidance Issues Not Addressed Escalation of Attack Issues Not Resolved Advantages/Disadvantages Advantages/Disadvantages Of Avoidance Time to think Good if issue trivial or relationship unimportant Minimizes harm Minimize others’ influence Suggests one does not care Allows conflicts to simmer Keeps conflicts unresolved Can set the stage for an explosion Can diminish intimacy Avoidance At Work Is Useful & Appropriate When: Open Communication Doesn’t Exist It Is Not Worth Investing The Energy The Costs Are Too High Parties Lack Conflict Skills COMPETITION Characterized by aggressive and uncooperative behavior Involves pursuing one’s own concerns at the expense of others’ Can be assertive or aggressive but aggression is common ADVANTAGES ADVANTAGES OF COMPETITION Allows one to be quick and decisive Can generate creative ideas Is useful if the goal is more important the relationship Is appropriate in some contexts such as sports, court, games DISADVANTAGES OF DISADVANTAGES OF COMPETITION Can lead to winners & losers damaged or destroyed relationships covert behaviors escalation violence TYPES OF COMPETITIVE TYPES OF COMPETITIVE TACTICS Threats claim an outcome will occur if behavior persists Verbal aggressiveness attacks the self concept Violence physical aggression COMPROMISE
Is moderately cooperative and assertive Results in gains and losses Is dependent on shared power ADVANTAGES ADVANTAGES OF COMPROMISE More time efficient than collaboration Reinforces balance of power Useful for minor issues Is a good backup method Appears reasonable DISADVANTAGES DISADVANTAGES OF COMPROMISE Can become an easy way out Prevents creative new options Chance measures such as flipping a coin are really a form of avoidance Everyone has to give up something ACCOMMODATION
Puts others’ concerns ahead of one’s own One can accommodate gladly or grudgingly Involves not asserting one’s needs ADVANTAGES OF ADVANTAGES OF ACCOMMODATION Best when one is wrong Demonstrates reasonableness Useful if issue is important to only one party Can prevent one party from harming another Prevents overt conflict DISADVANTAGES OF DISADVANTAGES OF ACCOMMODATION Can foster an undertone of competition & resentment Reduces creative options Can result in a psuedosolution Can lead to a lack of power Can mask problems COLLABORATION Involves concern for own and others’ goals Involves looking for underlying interests Attempts a winwin solution ADVANTAGES ADVANTAGES OF COLLABORATION Generates new ideas Shows respect for other party Increases commitment to the solution Leads to productive solutions Improves relationships DISADVANTAGES OF DISADVANTAGES OF COLLABORATION Requires an investment of time and energy May not be worthwhile for minor issues or unimportant relationships More verbally skilled may manipulate the process Bottom Line? Bottom Line?
Be alert, remain flexible and adaptive Anger Fundamentals Anger Fundamentals Most common cause at work is Anger response is normal “Domineering, uncivil behavior” Conflict communication styles Fundamental Attribution Error Injustice Never constructive, saps energy, corrosive Lets another live rentfree in your head Shouldn’t be left to fester Approaches to Anger Approaches to Anger
Managing Your Own Anger: Cognitive Restructuring Self talk Listen and behave nondefensively Consciously calm yourself – How important is it, really? Find distractions Don’t rehearse Avoid grudges Approaches to Anger Approaches to Anger
Managing the Anger of Others Be asymmetrical Validate the other person (TRIP) Probe – seek to reframe Distract Assume a problem orientation Refuse to be abused Disengage Learning New Ways to Respond Learning New Ways to Respond To Conflict Remember that: Responses when calm don’t transfer to when we’re upset We trust perceptions/feelings more than logic Emotion is privileged in the brain MINDFULNESS MINDFULNESS Conflict makes it harder to edit one’s behavior Mindless Mindful minimal information processing relies on past experiences to determine present behavior state of alertness/activity relies on current information to determine behavior Ethical Consciousness, Competence Consciousness, Competence and Choice
Consciousness Minimal Perceptual Constructual Articulate Unconscious Incompetence Competence Supercompetence Conscious Competence Incompetence 3 Factors 3 Factors Affecting Strategy Choice Individual differences Interpretation of the conflict Locus of control Conflict locus of control
Attribution Goal assessment Instrumental (Topic) Relationship Identity, presentation and face (Process?) Attribution and Motives Attribution and Motives Globalspecific Stableunstable Cause explains many behaviors Cause continues over time Cause withinoutside of the other Internalexternal Intentionalunintentional Praiseworthyblameworthy Selfish behavior = selfish person Attribution: Biases Attribution: Biases Self serving bias in conflicts Sees others’ competitive and avoidant behaviors Sees self as cooperative and competent (self protection) Rejects own responsibility in a conflict A Competence Approach A Competence Approach
Competence is: Appropriateness Effectiveness Following relational and social rules, norms, expectations Contextual Successfully achieving one’s goals Depends on awareness “Control” Goal Attribution Strategy Conflict Strategy Choices Conflict Strategy Choices Directcooperative Directcompetitive Indirectcooperative Compromise Collaboration Indirect competitive Accommodation Avoidance Enacting a Competence Approach Enacting a Competence Approach Engage in mindfulness Exert personal control Make external, specific, unstable attributions Engage in goal control Exert strategy control ...
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- Spring '06