RitaBorland_NarrativeEssay[1]2010

RitaBorland_NarrativeEssay[1]2010 - ItRita, Good...

Info iconThis preview shows pages 1–3. Sign up to view the full content.

View Full Document Right Arrow Icon
ItRita, Good introduction, nice hook, and your thesis could use a bit of work, but it is okay too. Not bad. Your content is good and so is your organization. Your content has some grammatical errors, but overall it flows well from intro to conclusion. Good descriptions. Keep up the work, make sure to proof read and keep at it. Mr. Evans Grade: see attached rubric Need a comma here, separating independent clauses Comma after “own”, dependant clause Good conclusion all started when I was a child. All kids have dreams of going to all of the different theme parks. For me it was always Walt Disney World . Don't get me wrong, places like Busch Gardens , Six Flags and Kentucky Kingdom are great and yes, I have been to all of them all and I had a great time, but still somehow I felt empty. Now, I am going to tell you how my dream came true.
Background image of page 1

Info iconThis preview has intentionally blurred sections. Sign up to view the full version.

View Full DocumentRight Arrow Icon
am the youngest out of seven kids and even though I was adopted Rita, Good introduction, nice hook, and your thesis could use a bit of work, but it is okay too. Not bad. Your content is good and so is your organization. Your content has some grammatical errors, but overall it flows well from intro to conclusion. Good descriptions. Keep up the work, make sure to proof read and keep at it. Mr. Evans Grade: see attached rubric Need a comma here, separating independent clauses Comma after “own”, dependant clause Good conclusion they were still my family. Every year there was a big Christmas and Easter. My sister Kirsten and I were the lucky ones we spent our summers in Florida, but we never went to Walt Disney World .
Background image of page 2
Image of page 3
This is the end of the preview. Sign up to access the rest of the document.

This note was uploaded on 03/09/2011 for the course ENG 227 taught by Professor Sherrybuell during the Spring '11 term at DeVry Chicago.

Page1 / 6

RitaBorland_NarrativeEssay[1]2010 - ItRita, Good...

This preview shows document pages 1 - 3. Sign up to view the full document.

View Full Document Right Arrow Icon
Ask a homework question - tutors are online