Relationship Paper

Relationship Paper - Erickson 1 Sarah Erickson Harjit...

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Erickson 1 Sarah Erickson Harjit Dosanjh English 101 5:00PM August 3, 2010 Relationship Revelations 2010 I chose to research and analyze my realistic, yet fairy-tale, interpersonal relationship that I love like a fat kid loves chocolate cake with my boyfriend, Mr. Eric Siers. The social exchange theory explains the reason I am in a romantic relationship with Eric (Adler 166). It describes that the positive rewards I receive from him tip the scale in this outcome, after you subtract the minor, negative costs (Adler 166). Eric and I have known each other for so long that it is easy for us to disclose secrets together and have them well received and respected in return. We have developed an ease of communication about our feelings, evident through relational messages that reflect our mutual high degrees of affinity, respect, and immediacy (Adler 170). People need relationships and interactions with others for several important reasons. I personally believe this relationship supports my need for intimacy. Intimacy is defined as being divided into three types including: physical, intellectual, and emotional closeness that explain some of the rewards that Eric and I share (Adler 180). The interpersonal need for self-disclosure is also an important reason to maintain this healthy relationship (Adler 184). Self-disclosure is needed in my relationship for further development, maintenance, enhancement, self-clarification, and reciprocity in return (Adler 183-184). I originally met Eric in 1998. We worked at separate places but crossed paths off and on. He was the manager of the Puyallup Movie Theater and I delivered pizza for Pizza Hut. We traded our employee benefits, his movie tickets for my pizza. This is known as the stage of Initiation according to the ten-stage developmental model designed by Mark Knapp. Initiating is described as contact that is limited to conversation openers and is important because its where
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Erickson 2 you present and formulate your first impressions, and level of interest in the person (Knapp 172). Eric and I limited our conversations to simple phrases such as “thanks for trading” and “have you seen that new movie”. I was definitely attracted to him and I noticed his non-verbal behaviors and nervousness which led me to believe that he felt the same way. We were both too shy to communicate our attraction and according to Knapp, this is very common and attributes a reason to why shy people prefer internet dating (Knapp 173). We traded several times that year until eventually Eric quit his job and disappeared. Later he told me that he joined the Marines. Five years later in the Summer of 2002, my friends and I threw a going away party for one of our friends who was home on leave and going back into the Navy. As chance would have it, my friend Keith is Eric's brother and he attended the party. According to Adler & Rodman, one of the reasons that we form relationships is proximity (pg. 164). We are more likely to develop friendships with people who are local, like neighbors, “and chances are good that we'll
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This note was uploaded on 05/16/2011 for the course COMM 101 taught by Professor Harjitdosanght during the Spring '11 term at Pierce College.

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Relationship Paper - Erickson 1 Sarah Erickson Harjit...

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