Kayley's Essay - Kaley Kanski Prof Doersch WRTG 1150 3...

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Kaley Kanski Prof. Doersch WRTG 1150 3 November 2008 Draft 1 Divorce: A Hereditary Disease While sitting at her kitchen table Kayla looks through the various volumes of scrapbooks documenting her childhood. The first few volumes displayed pictures of a happy family including her parents, her dog, and her sisters. But as she continues to flip through the pages she sees a notable difference in her family. Kayla knows she doesn’t need to look at pictures to feel this way about her family, and family life in general. Divorce is hard on many children and can change their perspective about marriage and intimate relationships. Kayla’s parents unfortunately got a divorce and she has since felt different about commitment. This is a common situation for children who have witnessed divorce. They often develop skepticism about marriage and distance themselves from close relationships (Cunningham et al 669). While many parents have no intention to hurt their children when they get a divorce, they rarely are aware of the long-lasting imprint it makes on their kids. Many events that people experience as children can strongly affect their adult lives (Wolfinger 1078). Most parents want the best for their children; therefore, it seems necessary that when parents are looking into divorce, because of marriage instability, that they remain together until their children are at least 18. At the age of 18 it is common that the young adults leave home and begin thinking independently. It is safest to wait until one’s children are at least 18 to divorce, if need be,
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because at that time it will affect them less (Wolfinger 665). If the parents choose not to wait until their children are 18 they might face the risk of transmitting divorce characteristics. It is very unlikely that anyone would plan to get a divorce in their lifetime because it has been said to be a rough experience. Many of the symptoms of divorce include depression, stress, low rates of self-esteem, regret, and feelings of hopelessness. Nobody would want to experience these deleterious feelings, nor would they wish them on anyone else. Parents considering divorce probably wouldn’t want their children to feel that way so they most likely wouldn’t want them to get a divorce. If this is the case, then these parents may want to try and maintain their marriage until the children are 18 so as not to hurt them in the long run. Many marriages face problems at some point in life, and as long as no abuse is involved, it is emotionally supportive if the parents refrain from divorce until their children are at least 18 (Cunningham et al 669). This is essential because otherwise it has been discovered to be harmful to their future ability to commit to intimate relationships (Segrin et al 363). It is often seen that children who had divorced parents will get a divorce in their marriages as well. This social inheritance of divorce is known as “intergenerational divorce transmission” in psychological and
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Kayley's Essay - Kaley Kanski Prof Doersch WRTG 1150 3...

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