Final Assessment - Paragraph One: Analysis of paragraph one...

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Paragraph One: Analysis of paragraph one and two The second paragraph seems to be more effective than the first paragraph. In the first paragraph, the writers work is choppy and lacking in sentence variety. He or she did not utilize different adjectives, pronouns, or verbs. Doing so will help prevent choppy, uninteresting sentences. The paragraph also seems to have a lot of repetition and no rhythm. The writer could have used more adjectives, pronouns, and, verbs to brighten up the piece. Not doing this makes it a very uninteresting piece of work. As for paragraph two, this has great sentence variety. In paragraph two, the sentences flow together and make sense. Doing this helps the readers understand and comprehend what is trying to be said. The writer also keeps the repetition to a minimum. The uses of different words help intrigue the reader and give the piece of work life. This, in the end, makes for a better read.
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