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Unformatted text preview: story within that scene. Transitions Some transitions were used. The story was relatively easy to follow. Dialog Dialog was used. However, it did not come from the scene of your choice. I guess the dialog was appropriate for the purpose of your writing. I’m just worried that it seems to create another scene. Verbs I think you can use stronger verbs. I also saw shifts in past and present tenses. I think it would be better if you kept everything other than the last paragraph in past tense. Daniel, I saw some grammatical mistakes. I think you should focus more on the specific scene at the tattoo parlor. Good luck....
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