00 - 成功留学文书写作必备...

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Unformatted text preview: 成功留学文书写作必备 每年秋天,美国各个大学的中国学生联谊会 CSSA(Chinese Students and Scholars Association)都会迎来一批新的中国留学生。在忙完机场接人和安排新生的临时居所后, 热情的老生往往会选一个天气好的周末开一个迎新 BBQ(Barbeque,烤肉)聚会。在烤 鸡腿和煎汉堡包的烟气中,喝过了几大杯各式各样的加冰饮料后,新生老生就聚在一起 谈天说地了。我清楚地记得我当新生的那一年,同桌的几个人都是从 SSS 大学机械系来 的。想到我的大学同学东分西散,天各一方,不禁为这么多 SSS 的同学能同时被招到机 械系而感到惊叹不已。细一打听才知道,机械系前一年招了一个 SSS 大学的高才生周平。 此人学习极好,无论多么难,多么抽象的考试,开卷、闭卷都必考 100 分,被同系的中 国人冠以“周 100”的美名。该系的老师对周平极为赏识,于是在第二年招生时,请周平 推荐几个 SSS 学校的学生。可想而知,周平的推荐大概比国内系主任的推荐都强几倍。 被他推荐的几位佼佼者都顺顺当当地拿到奖学金飞到了美国。 这几位幸运儿的经历和写申请材料有什么关系呢?让我们分析一下他们的留学申请 经历。机械系的教授从周平身上已经认可了 SSS 大学机械系学生的能力。周平对学校系 里的师资和科研方向都很熟悉,可以给后来的师弟们提供足够多的内部消息。可以想象, 在申请者与招生者相互衡量的过程中,双方不费吹灰之力,便可以达成共识和信任。很 自然,机械系的教授们面对着几百份申请材料时将会更偏爱 SSS 大学的学生。人们常说, 有关系用关系,没关系拉关系。这所谓的“做人经”虽然听上去有些庸俗,但在申请留 学的过程中却非常适用。这几位 SSS 大学的同学靠周平的“关系” ,就轻而易举地实现了 他们的美国梦。毫不夸张地说,留学申请的成功真是实力加运气的结果。因此我们建议: 在申请的过程中,不仅要认真地对待各项考试及必备的材料,还应该抓住每一个机会, 多和自己在国外学习进修的师兄弟、师姐妹联系。 当然,像以上几位有如此幸运经历的申请人恐怕还是极少数。如果您找不到现成的 “关系” ,该如何让招生的教授了解您呢?写一份逼真、可信、感人的自传!许多申请人 提到自传就头疼,他们能一口气考过 TOEFL、GRE、GMAT,轮到自传、简历、推荐信 这些软材料却抓耳挠腮,迟迟不肯动手。这些同学往往熬到临近申请材料递交的截止日 期,才着慌了。于是,不得不速战速决,草率了事。这样写出的文书通常未经斟酌,材 料不够精彩,结构不够紧凑,整体文章自然不能吸引人。结果错过了一个给招生委员会 评委留下深刻印象的机会。 其实,招生委员会评委在招生的忙碌季节,每天要读上百封文书。他们挑选的不是 该拒绝的对象,而是令他们感兴趣的学生。一份真实生动、具有说服力的自传会拉近申 请人和挑选者的距离。如果您的自传能使阅读它的教授联想到一个朝气蓬勃、刻苦又聪 明、有理想、有抱负的青年,那么即使某项硬指标不够理想,您被录取的可能性也极大。 ·2· 第 0 部分 写在前面 试想,谁愿意拒绝一个像您自传中所刻画的有潜力的有志青年呢?相反,如果您的 GPA、 TOEFL、GRE、GMAT 成绩无可挑剔,而自传却写得或是有气无力,或是狂妄自大,那 么即使您在现实生活中是一个令人佩服、招人喜欢的人,也可能会不幸地被拒之门外。 毕竟,招生委员会只认识那个自传中的并不那么吸引人的您。 不难想象,招生委会很容易拒绝一个申请材料干巴巴、冷冰冰,像部考试机器的申 请人,但却会很乐意接纳一个有朝气、有特色、热情、肯干、有志向的申请人。本来您 作为一个来自中国的申请者是很有特色的,可是希望出国留学的中国学生的人数与日俱 增。而您的中国竞争对手又往往和您有同样高的 TOEFL、GRE、GMAT 成绩,如果您无 法通过强有力的自传、简历、推荐信来展现自己,您的申请材料很可能就会消失在茫茫 “人”海之中了。从这个角度说来,把写出高质量的出国文书比做“拉关系”一点儿都 不过分。 那么,怎样通过成功的自传和招生委员会建立信赖与积极的关系呢?一般说来,一 篇写得好的自传应该既谈论了您在学习与科研方向取得的成绩,又刻画了您的性格人品。 您可以根据自己的实际情况决定每一部分所占的比例。但无论是选择重点描写学习和科 研经历,还是集中抒发人生感受,这两部分都应该出现在您的自传中。为什么呢?我们 都知道中国学生在申请研究生院入学的同时往往也需要申请包括 Fellowship、Research Assistant(RA) Teaching Assistant(TA)等各式的奖学金。试想,假如您是招生委员会 、 的评委,您会选什么样的 Fellowship 侯选人呢?您是否希望这个候选人除了具有优秀的 学业成绩,还是一个有创造力、对所研究的领域有热情、有想法、勇于克服困难的人? 同样的道理,如果要招收一个 TA,您是否希望选一个有耐心、善于交流的学生?招生委 员会的成员无法通过分数来了解您的素质和性格。他们是凭什么最终决定该不该给您 TA、RA 或 Fellowship 呢?答案就是您的自传、推荐信和简历! 自传、推荐信、简历是您能为自己做的最好的广告。每份材料所传递的信息必须各 有侧重,相互补充,相互呼应,有机地联系起来。一般说来,简历应该列举所有您认为 自豪的和申请学校有关的信息,例如学位、课外活动、工作经历、特长和技能,甚至是 选过的课程,取得的成绩等。编写简历不需加入太强的个人色彩,能做到充实、简练、 明了就达到目的了。 推荐信是别人陈述对您的看法,这是一个延伸地描写您的优点的好机会。值得注意 的是,研究生院一般要求三封推荐信,这三封信万万不能写得像从同一个模子里印出来 似的。我们修改过的推荐信中,有许多申请人都犯了这样的毛病。例如,有一个同学因 为想突出自己刻苦学习的精神,在自传中写自己为了克服一个“拦路虎”工作到半夜三 点。结果他的三个推荐人(一个是系副主任,一个是英语老师,一个是辅导员)在各自 ·3· 成功留学文书写作必备 的推荐信中也都提到这一细节,并不约而同地写到自己是如何为这位同学不达目的、誓 不罢休的精神所感动。这种情节安排显然会令人生疑。评委首先会问为什么区区一件加 夜班的事会搞得人人皆知?然后又会感到好奇,像每一个忙碌的人一样,您的推荐人必 有一大堆他们自己的事情,又怎么会对您学习到深夜的小事记忆犹新?类似的例子还有 好多。许多同学为了显示推荐信出自于不同的人,于是为每一封推荐信更换打印的字体、 型号、信头。可是每封推荐信又都采用相同的格式,讲述相同的故事,甚至犯相同的语 法错误。这样写出来的推荐信,当然会令人对您的诚实与可信度产生疑问,从而大大影 响了申请人被录取的可能性。应当记住的是:推荐信一定要真实可信,符合常理! 如果说简历必须记载发生过的客观的事情,推荐信必须表述推荐人对申请人合情合 理的评价的话,那么自传则少了许多条条框框,从而给申请人展现自己最光辉的一面带 来极大的自由度。毫无疑问,自传在申请过程中起着决定性的作用。这就要求申请人在 写自传时,能从构思、收集材料,到书写、编排、修改都投入更多的时间和精力。自传 必须做到真实、生动、独特。 为了帮助申请人尽快进入角色,并进一步阐明我们对简历、推荐信、自传内容各具 特色、各有侧重点的观点,我们在这里分析一下申请人陈东向研究生院递交的这套文书。 体会一下它们是如何有效地结合在一起,相辅相成地突出陈东的优点和个性的。 推荐信一 09/01/2002 To Whom It May Concern: It is with great pleasure that I write this letter of recommendation for Mr. Dong Chen for his application of admission to the doctoral program of marketing at your university. Mr. Chen is a well-prepared and talented candidate with vast research potential. I have been Mr. Chen’s advisor since his entrance to our university in 1999. I was also his professor when he took my course, International Shipping Management, in Spring 2001. My long acquaintance with him leads me to believe that Mr. Chen is an intelligent, creative and hard-working young man. He has demonstrated impressive academic excellence in class discussions and group projects. ·4· 第 0 部分 写在前面 As an example of his academic ability, Mr. Chen showed creative thinking on issues regarding Operations and Management of International Shipping. In a discussion about organizing sources of goods, many students based their ideas on familiar factors such as geographical locations, prices and reputation of shipping companies, as well as designated shipping lines to attract customers. Mr. Chen brought forward the fresh idea of taking advantage of superior services. Later, I discovered that he had applied related theories from his Sales Promotion class to the Shipping Marketing Operations. I believe his ability to apply interdisciplinary knowledge in a variety of settings will be very beneficial to his future studies and research. Mr. Chen is a man of integrity. He tells truth about what he thinks of my class, even if he feels something that I may not want to hear. He is always eager to help his fellow classmates whenever there is a chance. These characteristics are especially noticeable in a time when so many students tend to care only about themselves. In sum, based on what I know of Mr. Chen, I have no doubt that he will, given the opportunity, prove himself to be a successful graduate student in your University. I strongly recommend him. Should you need further information about him, please feel free to contact me. Yours truly Sheng Liu Professor, Associate Chair of International Trade Department Email:[email protected] Phone:8610-11223344 Fax:8610-11223345 点评 选择自己的导师、系副主任作为推荐人是十分明智的。这个推荐人既了解 申请人又有权威,写出来的推荐信自然有分量。这封推荐信通过导师对陈东课 堂表现的观察,着重赞扬申请人的创造性思维能力以及扎实的知识功底。在接 近结尾处,推荐人提到陈东是一个诚实的、肯帮助人的人。虽然只是短短几句, 却一语中的,令人信服。 ·5· 成功留学文书写作必备 推荐信二 October 5, 2002 To Whom It May Concern, At the request of Mr. Dong Chen, a promising student of mine, I am very pleased to write this letter to support his application for admission and financial support in your Department. I first met Mr. Chen in 2001, when he took my course, “Production and Operations Management”. While many students considered this course difficult, Mr. Chen grasped the course material thoroughly and effectively. His attentive attitude and solid preparation showed in his knowledgeable answers to my questions and from his speeches in discussions and presentations. Engaging in independent thinking, he usually raised ingenious and creative topics. Despite his strengths, he was not egocentric. He was always willing to share his ideas with others and to take advice and learn from his classmates. His performance was so excellent that I later invited him to be my Teaching Assistant for this course. He introduced a number of new ways to teach the class, such as an on-line chat room to encourage student participation, and effectively taught the class many relevant management theories, achieving great results. His strong background in theory, good presentation skills and creative teaching methods won him great respect from his students and from me. Mr. Chen always shows a great deal of perseverance, calmness and optimism when facing difficulties. As his advisor, I have assigned him to lead a couple of projects. Some of the projects were large and complex, such as developing a complete Equipment Management System for SOCL. He is not afraid to tackle new challenges. Instead, he has been so enthusiastic and dedicated to his work that he is able to stay focused, and to lead his team members to tackle problems step by step. In addition, his humor and witticism usually cheer the whole team up while they are under great pressure. These good qualities have added great value to not only managing projects, but also all his studies and research. Mr. Chen has a strong desire to pursue new knowledge. He is constantly reading to keep track with the latest trends in academia. He once assisted me in translating some books on supply chain management. His extensive background in reading helped him complete the assignment ·6· 第 0 部分 写在前面 smoothly. He has also attended numerous domestic and international seminars and conferences. Exchanging ideas with people from academia and industry has greatly broadened his horizons. For an outstanding student like Chen, I am glad to offer my strongest recommendation, and am sure he will be a valuable member in your research group. Sincerely yours, Qing Li Professor, Dept. of International Trade Department Vice Dean, School of Management [email protected] 点评 在这封推荐信中,李教授对陈东开阔的思维、丰富的知识、勇于面对困难 的魄力、有效解决问题的能力以及好学的精神给予了高度的称赞。李教授还提 到了陈东的幽默感,从而暗示了陈东开朗的个性。 推荐信三 09/24/2002 Dear Sir or Madam: I am very pleased to recommend one of my best students, Mr. Dong Chen, to the prestigious graduate program of marketing at your school. I became acquainted with Dong when I was a substitute teacher for his College English class in spring 2000. Dong is a warm-hearted person and very conscientious in whatever he does. He not only participated in my class with incomparable enthusiasm but also helped me greatly to improve my teaching methods to communicate effectively with quieter students in the class. His leading involvement in class activities affected everyone in the class, helping create very positive teaching atmosphere and improving the language abilities of all the students. At the end of the class, students were able to stand in front of their peers to retell stories and comment on them ·7· 成功留学文书写作必备 in English, an unimaginable task at the beginning. Meanwhile, Mr. Chen took his Teaching Assistant assignment as a class representative very seriously. His responsibilities included trivial details such as helping communicate with students from different departments and organizing all kinds of activities. His sincerity and good organizational and personal skills won him respect and recognition from fellow students. Dong has achieved high English proficiency through his innate talent for language and hard work. This proficiency is reflected in the high scores of his college English tests. He ranked among the top 2 percent in a class of 50. He can speak and write fluently in English. I believe this will enable him to attend lectures, presentations and seminars in an English environment with no language difficulty. Mr. Dong’s sincere nature, conscientiousness working spirit and self-motivation will enable him a further success in his chosen field. I strongly recommend him for your most favorable consideration. Should I be of further help, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] abc.end.cn. Sincerely yours, Ying Lu Professor of Foreign Languages Department BEC Examiner 点评 过硬的语言能力对于学商科的申请人是十分重要的。选择英语系的教授作 为推荐人对于进一步证实自己的英语能力非常有利。这份推荐信的可贵之处在 于它不仅强调了申请人高水平的英语应用能力,还通过陈东作为英语课代表帮 助老师提高教学质量的事迹,称赞了他认真负责,善于与老师、同学交流的长 处。这对招生委员会考虑陈东为 TA 候选人将大有帮助。 ·8· 第 0 部分 写在前面 简历 DONG CHEN Apt 101 5th Street, Xizhimen District, Beijing 100031, P.R.CHINA [email protected] (86)10-2233445 OBJECTIVE: In the short-term, to obtain a Ph.D. Degree in the area of Market Research. Long-term objective is to become a top scholar/professor in the field of Market Research. EDUCATION: B.A., 6/1999 – 7/2003 expected, Department of International Trade, University of ABC, SSS, P.R.China, GPA: 3.65. MARKETING RESEARCH EXPERIENCE: Part-time Market Researcher, Star Mobiles, SSS China, 6/2002~9/2002 Conducted a comprehensive consumer survey and interviewed 300 consumers. Generated a research report that was regarded as very useful by the Marketing director. Found that one third of college students buy mobile phone because to keep up with popular trends; only one third of college students bought the mobile phone because they need it; Approximately one third of students own a top line mobile phone worth at least RMB 2000 (US $250). Developed a product promotion plan, including an advertising strategy. Reached a profit margin of 80% for my 3 months at the company. ·9· 成功留学文书写作必备 COURSE HIGHLIGHTS: Advanced Calculus: 92/100, Advanced Calculus: 83/100 Linear Algebra: 90/100, Microeconomics: 84 /100 Macroeconomics: 86/100, Organization Behavior: 92/100 Marketing: 82/100, Management: 86 /100 Business Writing in English: 94/100 LANGUAGE PROFICIENCY: Chinese: Native English: CET-4 96/100, CET-6 89.5/100, Oral English: A TOEFL 643 (66/67/60) TWE 4.0 GRE 600/800/790 (85%/97%/97%) ACTIVITIES: Program Host, Science Online, University of ABC’s Radio Station, 1999 ~ present Created a refreshing program, Science Online; Introduce the latest science breakthrough in China and abroad to program listeners; Interview students and professors on a regular basis. Director, Public Relations, Student Union, University of ABC, 2000 ~ 2001 Motivated team members in fundraising campaign; Collected a large amount of money from our alumni and several large companies. Tutor, SSS, 2000 ~ 2002 Taught 10 junior middle school kids; Profiled each student according to their personality and knowledge differences; Developed an appropriate teaching strategy for each student; Helped students get accepted to the No.1 high school in our city. ·10· 第 0 部分 写在前面 HORNORS: Excellent Leader Award, University of ABC, 2001 People’s Award, ABC University, 2002 WangYi Scholarship, 2001 Honor Student, 1999 ~ 2002 HOBBIES: Singing, Dancing, Swimming, Drama, Reading and Travel. 点评 这份简历充分展现了陈东无可挑剔的求学经历。从修过的课程、参加过的 活动,到得过的奖项,都表明陈东无疑是一个勤奋好学、发展全面的优秀人才。 自传 Faced with widespread foreign capital investments and transcontinental sector involvements in the comparatively immature Chinese market, I have found that the old Chinese marketing concepts and methods are being greatly challenged in the face of tough competition. As I learn more about my major field of business and administration at ABC university in SSS, which is currently seeing the huge impact of foreign economic factors, I increasingly feel the urge to learn, in as many aspects as possible, western concepts and strategies of marketing in order to build a successful future career in the teaching and research of marketing in Chinese society. With this in mind, it is natural for me to plan for advanced study of marketing in the United States, the country that leads the rest of the world in this area and which has the most excellent and creative research on marketing theories and practices. I am fascinated by the doctoral marketing program at your university, especially after I read research articles authored by professors at your school. Therefore, I am very pleased to apply to this program. My college education has helped me to build a well-rounded background. After a series of successful academic performances in China from elementary school through high school, ·11· 成功留学文书写作必备 where tough competition starts at a young age, I was admitted into the School of Transportation & Communication at ABC University in 1999, majoring in business administration. Realizing the great significance of learning the college core courses when just begining my academic career, I worked very hard on courses related to mathematics, English language proficiency, economics, computer languages and applications in management field, etc. In addition to the high GPA I earned in those courses, I deliberately trained myself to learn from all resources available. I extensively used the library, internet and a variety of academic seminars and presentations to think deeply about all conceptions of various subjects. Take as an example the time I took Management Theories and Market Promotion, a course taught by an instructor who had been educated at SUNY. Through this course, I became familiar with fundamental theories in the field of management and was able to carry out many domestic and international case studies. I was particularly interested in the area of organizational theory, leading me to browse many books on this subject, and finally causing me to conclude that human factors are the absolute core of any market. This interest helped direct my research to focus on the influence of human factors on other factors in a market. At different levels of marketing, no matter the macro level, managerial level or the micro level, the methods taken should undoubtedly reflect that the human factors are in the leading roles in pricing, promotion, name brand establishment, etc. This is a very complicated topic involving social, economic, cultural and psychological perspectives. I am looking at this area as my long-term pursuit to build effective theories and practical methods, which will be applied to the Chinese market so as to contribute to the creation of a new and healthy market when China is emerging on the international market. One of the research tools that I have been paying great attention to is the relatively new field of information technology, which, on the basis of integrated and prompt information, has made market globalization possible, I have had a deep interest in computer operations since high school and have spent much spare time on analyzing computer data systems to learn how they provide statistical and accurate information for decision makers and how decisive the IT role is in modern management research and operations. In many course projects I learned to design questionnaires and to conduct surveys among target groups of subjects, as well as how to use computer statistical tools to analyze data and draw conclusions from it. ·12· 第 0 部分 写在前面 I also take pride in my English proficiency which I have made great efforts to achieve. The capability of speaking several Chinese dialects has enabled me to speak English fluently with a less pronounced accent, as was commented on by an American language teacher. In an English Writing course during my junior year, under the direction of a Harvard graduate, I independently finish a research paper entitled Cognitive Intelligence vs. Emotional Intelligence for Work Success. The 2000-word essay was written in entirely in English my English writing abilities were greately sharpened by organizing and wording this document. I also enjoyed the process of browsing through related books and articles to gather writing material. From this experience, I additionally learned how to carry out independent research and how to write research papers. Born into a family with working parents, I was disciplined from a young age to be self-dependent both at school and in life. My parents respected individual ideas and encouraged creative thinking. In this family atmosphere, I have been able to think and act independently and confidently. Self-discipline is also a lesson my parents taught me so that even when I am living far from them, I can design my own life plans and focus on them. Due to amblyopia, I developed after a high fever when I was two months old and did not have normal eyesight for a relatively long period of my life. It was not until after a series of prescribed exercises and a final surgery at the age of 12 did I regain normal eyesight. During this time, I not only realized how much care I received from my parents and doctors, an experience that has led me to have a willing heart to help those in pain or in need, I also learned about perseverance when I made up the study that I had missed. I am grateful towards my life experience which was valuable in molding my character. Many social activities I participated in college greatly enriched my life and improved my communication and organizing skills. Through these I was also able to experience the “real world” from the Ivory Tower of an institute of higher education. As a freshman, I helped host a new radio program, Science Online, at the university radio station. To produce the program, I read through a large number of magazines and related literature in order to keep up on breaking news in the field of science. Additionally, I once worked in the publicity department in the student union. As another example of my social activities, during one summer break I joined the college student delegation to visit the Midwestern region of China and got to know the social condition in that area. Also while at college, I tutored more than 10 kids on weekends ·13· 成功留学文书写作必备 and, through this experience, learned how to teach individuals with different personalities. I realized that special content and method design is the key to a student’s performance and improvement at school. I also won trust and respect from the parents of these students. My specific research and professional plan for the next 10 years is to further my study and research in a doctoral program in an American business school, eventually earning a PhD degree. Meanwhile, I hope to do research projects in industry cooperates or other organizations. Afterwards, I shall come back to China for a long term career as a top scholar, conducting more detailed marketing research, teaching and publishing. It is my lifelong goal to help make the Chinese markets an internationally recognized one. Your full consideration plays an influential role in my research development. A favorable reply is greatly appreciated. 点评 陈东在自传中谈到自己因幼时视力不好而萌发并养成了乐于助人的美德及 坚韧不拔的意志,不由得令招生委员会对申请人产生敬意。叙述自己的科研和 社会活动经历,帮助招生委员会进一步了解陈东的背景,随后又谈到自己对中 国市场经济的看法以及对研究美国市场经济学的热情,这些都显示出陈东是一 个有思想、有抱负、有潜力的青年。 整体看来,录取委员会在阅读完陈东的简历、推荐信以及自传后,得出结论:陈东 是一个学习成绩优秀、科研经历丰富、爱好广泛、开朗、乐观、善于交往、乐于助人、 有思想、有抱负、有潜力、坚韧不拔的青年。招生委员会若是不录取这么好的候选人, 恐怕连他们自己也会感到遗憾的! 希望以上的例子可以启发、帮助申请人认识到合理安排申请材料的重要性。相信经 过斟酌思索,您构思和撰写的申请文书也能为您插上翅膀,助您飞得更高、更远。 ·14· ...
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