Chap05 - Pragmatic Postulates: Palo Alto Group l Relational...

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Chapter Five RELATIONAL COMPETENCE
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Relational Message Patterns l Complementarity and Symmetry l Confirmations and Disconfirmations l Spirals l Unwanted Repetition
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Dominance Messages l One up messages: take control l One down messages: relinquish control
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Complementarity and Symmetry l Complementary: one-up messages followed by one-down messages l Competitive symmetry: one-up messages followed by one-up messages l Submissive symmetry: one-down messages followed by one-down messages
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Relational Themes l Dominance l Emotional tone: arousal and composure l Similarity l Defining Episodes: formality and task-social orientation l Intimacy
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Dimensions of Intimacy l Affection/hostility l Trust l Depth/superficiality l Inclusion/exclusion l Intensity of involvement
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Disconfirming Messages
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Confirming Messages
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Unformatted text preview: Pragmatic Postulates: Palo Alto Group l Relational definitions are mutually created l Patterns of behavior allows us to understand relationships l Blaming is unproductive l As Freud would say, so much is in the unconscious! l Punctuation is important for understanding Wilmots Guidelines for Stopping Spirals l Change your behavior. l Use third parties. l Reaffirm your relational goals. l Spend either more or less time with partner. l Change an external situation. Empathy and Perspective-Taking l Improve perspective taking by: Avoiding egocentricity Asking others to verbalize l Improve empathy by: Paying attention to others spontaneous expressions Being expressive yourself...
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Chap05 - Pragmatic Postulates: Palo Alto Group l Relational...

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