Com notes 3 - Chapter 10: Personal Relationships...

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Chapter 10: Personal Relationships Understanding Relationships Personal vs. Social Social - (we behave based on social roles, we interact based on those roles, your interaction is the same regardless of the person but its determined by their function in society. (ex. Go to shriver and get a meal and tell the person what you want. You say the exact same thing regardless of who they are. Doesn’t matter if it’s a 40 yr old woman or a 19 yr old man. Their purpose is the same) Personal - (voluntary commitments based on irreplaceable people, these people are viewed as individuals…you cant just replace this person with another. You have specific friends to help you with specific things. People are not interchangeable) Circumstance vs. Choice Circumstance- exist because of situations or conditions. (ex. Coworkers…if you move away you don’t really talk to them anymore because you are not in that circumstance anymore.) Choice- you select to initiate, maintain, or dissolve these relationships. Relationship Formation What leads us to begin a relationship with one person and not another? Interpersonal Attraction : the degree in which you desire to form or maintain an interpersonal relationship with someone Physical Attraction - could reduce relationship possibilities (ex. Sororities attract different kinds of girls appearance-wise) (certain groups that seek out certain physical attributes based on the activities they do…like sports teams) o Phi Scale/ Golden Ratio o 1: 1.6 o Beauty mask- the closer it fits to a persons face, the more beautiful they are. o 42 ratios o People tend to have relationships with people that are close to their attraction scale. Proximity - the closer you are to somebody, the more opportunities you have to interact with them. Technology plays a role in proximity. Similarity - people who share similar hobbies and interests. Types of similarities are important (values, personality, hobbies, interests, religious background, upbringing) Credibility, Competence, and Charisma - someone that is competent is knowledgeable or skilled in areas we value. Credibility (how trustworthy are they? How honest are they?) Competence + Credibility= Charisma. Complementary needs - motivates us to engage in a relationship:
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1. Inclusion- the need to include others in activities and the need to be included. 2. Affection- the need to be loved and accepted. To accept and love others. 3. Control- our ability to make decisions and take responsibility. The need to make decisions for themselves. Need others to make decisions for them Reciprocation of Liking- helps us confirm our sense of self. We like other people who like us. Relationship Potential-
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Com notes 3 - Chapter 10: Personal Relationships...

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