familypsych-page79 - Friends and grandparents dont fill...

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Friends and grandparents don’t fill void of lost parent. Immediately after divorce – often psychological problems such as regression, sleep disturbance and somatic complaints, guilt, anger & withdrawal, blame self (especially with school age) Help them cope via: 1) promote healthy morning – saying goodbye to family as it used to be. Help child work out feelings. Elementary aged especially grieve deeply (preschool too) 2) assure child that he/she is loved & will be cared for (often fears abandonment) 3) correct misconceptions – if blames self, or if feels he must take the place of missing parent 4) help him/her see it is final – can’t get parents together again regardless (often try to manipulate) 5) help adjustment to new family – it’s ok to love both parents, don’t have to choose. Parents that fight via kids cause severe problems 6) help them develop relationships with other adults, youth pastor especially helpful – parents have little energy to give child attention during divorce.
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