poem critique #2 - even without a report of land. After...

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The paper’s argument is that dickinson’s diction, specifically the word despair is used to show the feelings of constraint on society. It is some what clear what the paper is about, but the only issue I have is that the opening paragraph is like one stretched out thesis. I cant exactly pin point which line or lines are the thesis exactly, cause the whole thing is kind of a general thesis. The point of the word usage to show constraint can be debated, which is good. It doesn’t really make me rethink the poem, but that’s probably because I chose the same poem for my paper. You didn’t include any other techniques so that somewhat threw me off, but after I read the rest of the paper I realized that it made sense that way. You talk about other techniques to strengthen your point, like the allusions she makes. Maybe you could include that in your opening paragraph, so that way diction isn’t the only technique you mention. You give a lot of good examples and details like the breathing with a key. The last stanza is explained well, with without a chance and
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Unformatted text preview: even without a report of land. After that you talk about the structure of the first line giving a negative tone, that could also be some technique mentioned in the first paragraph. You mention the social aspect of the poem, but you include that here and there in the poem. Maybe that could be used in the conclusion paragraph as a macrocosm and so that gives more insight on the topic instead of just repeating the same thesis over again. Another thing is that you use a lot of superlatives to describe dickinsons poem which is fine, but the point of the paper isnt a critique of the poem itself so even though its fine im not sure its necessary to use words like masterpiece, that seems more like something that critics write in the front flap of a novel. The organization in general is pretty good, the structure of each body paragraph was concise. In general the paper is real good though, I was just trying to find things wrong with it, but there wasnt much, at least to me....
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