cmst-exam-2 - Thursday Sept 24 2009 Audience-Theory Content and Relational messages-To understand the relationship between the people you want to look

09/29/2009 Thursday Sept. 24, 2009 Audience: -Theory Content and Relational messages -To understand the relationship between the people you want to look at this relational aspect -Relational definition - how do you define yourself to another person -As we get to know one another we let them know this -Define who we are to one another -At the same time within the relationship we have a relationship culture -The atmosphere of the relationship (positive or negative) -We do this through a relational contract - negations in the relationship, informal and just evaluates. Factors or types of relationships: -Number of people involved rather or not it’s a Dyact (2 people) or Group (3 or more) -Purpose: task (developed for the propose to develop a task) or social (for run or personal reasons) -Duration: short term (relationship with a teacher each semester) or long term (those you have more time with) -Level of intimacy: causal (min level of support; greeter at wal-mart) in-between (moderate level of support; friends and colleagues) and intimate (max level of support; partners or best friends) Relational expectations -Depends on what we out of the relationship -Prototype: Label: friends Criteria: text/facebook Behavior: everyday Social exchange theory - how we operate. The rewards - the cost = a profit -Rewards - what you get out the relationships -Social relationship - those relationship we have with others based on our public selves -Public relationships - those relationships your reproduce with public self and others You make decision based on what types of relationships you want Duck's Filtering theory: relationships come in levels (like an onion) -Society or incidental cues: you have to have a chance to meet somebody -Pre-interaction cues: as you check somebody out you look at their behavior Physical cues

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Behavior -Interaction cues: as you get to know someone -Cognitive or thoughts: Seinflied - Elaine, "I can't not date someone who is Pro- Choice" Magnets (attracted to) -Physical Beauty Matching principle - we are attracted to people we think are our equals -Similar to us - gets back to values, who we are and what we want in life -Complementary - different aspects of a personality -Reciprocal liking - want to like each other -Cost can out weigh the rewards Social exchange theory Example: the Cosby show -Cliff and Claire How a relationships comes together - The Knap stages of coming together: 1. Initiating - a chance to meet and know someone, choice to or not to interact with someone 2. Experimenting - get to know this person, what are their likes and dislikes 3. Intensity - increase self disclosure; talk about serious issues and spend more time together. Different test: -Indirect suggestions: joke around -Separation test: see how the other person acts when your not together (apart from each other) -Endurance test: how much with they put up with -Triangle test: involve a third person in the relationship to test them and see how their reaction will be 4. Integrating - "we-ness" involved; buying/doing things together; invitations are together; act alike 5. Bonding - something official puts you together; wedding, ring, moving into