This preview shows page 1. Sign up to view the full content.
Unformatted text preview: : Kelley & Stahelski – Competitive people make others competitive
– Think everyone is competitive • Hostile Attribution Bias (Ken Dodge)
Blame in couples, Karney Percentage m aki ng offer • People are selfish, 80
40--50% < 40% Toxic thought: Happiness found in Toxic thought: Happiness found in Unbridled pursuit of SelfInterest
• Ayn Rand: To act on – Cooperation lights up Ventral Caudate • Dunn et al. (2008) – Average American: spends 1714 on self, 146 giving 0.25
Change i n happi ness from m orni ng • behalf of another person is treason
Rilling 2002 0.2
-0.2 Give to others Spend on self Rumination (NolenHoeksema)
• Dwell on problems, overthink
• Measured by: “I go to my room alone and think about my feelings”
“I isolate myself and think about the reasons I’m feeling this way” • Related to: – gender differences in depression
– ruminative style leads to depression, transforms negative moods into enduring dysphoric states
– rumination leads to less optimism, reduced energy, less motivation, worsened concentration, depressive emotion and though What to do?
What to do?
Contemplate – Loving kindness, gratitude, appreciate common humanity, suffering • Fill your environment with healthy thoughts Individualism, Myths of wisdom of Individualism, Myths of wisdom of the ages
• We adhere to individualist credo (we’re separate, find truth on own)
• Great Tradition: Age of Enlightenment (Individual Rights), Transcendentalism (Emerson; Whitman: Song of Myself)
• As people age, the thing the seek the most is loving friends, family; connection (Carstensen) Losing our ultrasociality?
Losing our ultrasociality?
• Divorce rate high (40% to 50%)
• Marital satisfaction has declined in past 30 years (Myers)
• Rise in loneliness (Caccioppo)
• Americans have lost on average 1 close friend in the past 20 years • Average American child spends more time watching TV than with parents A Need to...
View Full Document
- Spring '12