Relationships that do not start off well will probably fail Growth Ideal

Relationships that do not start off well will

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Relationships that do not start off well will probably fail Growth Ideal relationships develop over time Obstacles can make love even stronger A relationship succeeds through hard work and resolution of incompatibilities Mindsets are orthogonal, so it is possible to hold both mindsets “Fate brings people together, but then it’s up to them” Mindsets are flexible and can change over time Empathetic Accuracy Understanding the thoughts and feelings of one’s partner Why is this important for a relationship? Facilitates communication, support, resolving conflict How would we measure this? Mood Perception of partner’s mood Study: Transition into Parenthood 78 couples having their first baby Daily diary design during pregnancy, infancy, and toddlerhood You are less empathetically accurate when a baby is born b you have to re-learn your partner as a new person especially bc they’re changing as a parent also
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Why to study this Having your first child is a major life transition (global and daily stressors) Dyadic stress: Both partners face it together Findings: Empathetic accuracy goes down during infancy Interdependence Theory The extent to which the actions of each partner influences the outcomes of the other Greater interdependence = greater opportunity for conflict “My interest conflict with your interest” Relationships and Goal Pursuits Goal: Something you are trying to achieve Why might goal pursuit be important in relationships? SHAAH 2003 experiment Asked participant for name of mom, name of friend, goal mom has for you, and goal friend has for you Asked to rate the closeness with mom and with friend Given filler task Asked how committed, how many times will you pursue throughout the week Primed with mom’s name, primed with friend’s name, or primed with control world If close and primed, more likely to pursue goals Regulation Self-Regulation: The study of psychological and behavioral processes that move people toward desired end states and away from undesired end states Transactive Goal Dynamics Relationships are a regulating unit, with the partners as subunits in a single system of goal dynamics, a system in which resources are pooled 3 scenarios: One partner’s goal Parallel goals Can be pursued by one or both partners Shared goals Same outcome held by both partners What kind of goal is trickiest for relationships? Health/fitness Is goal support always helpful? No Weight loss study Wives are more likely to be successful when their husbands are told to be uninvolved
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Being Single Why? Demographics 97 men total for every 100 women Automatically decreases marriage rate (only 97% women can get married at all) Not as a large as a gender difference as we would see in China (more boys than girls) or in a post war period (loss of many men) Think about how marriage rates must look in these instances Economics
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