o 1950’s & 60’s: Proof of love o 1970’s & 80’s: Improper state born of insecurity and personality defects o 21 st century: Double-edged sword Seen as both expression of love and perceived paranoia To consider: How would you feel if you could not make your partner jealous? Two types of jealousy
o Reactive jealousy: Occurs in response to an actual threat to a valued relationship. Way of suggesting to us that we need to attend to our relationship Can occur with physical acts with another, flirting, or fantasies of being with another Most feel if partner unfaithful Some justifications for jealousy Survey of 700 American college students Most reported having dated, kissed, fondled, or slept with another while in a serious relationship. 2/3 men and 1/3 women kissed and fondled another 1/2 men and 1/3 women had sex with another o Suspicious jealousy: Occurs when one’s partner has not misbehaved, and one’s suspicions do not fit the facts at hand. Results in mistrust and snooping People vary in this jealousy in the absence of any real threat. Jealousy is universal, whereas suspicious jealousy is not. Who is prone to jealousy? o On average, men and women do not differ. o Individual differences exist: Dependence on a relationship More alternatives Less jealousy Feelings of inadequacy in a relationship Fear of not being the best match for your partner. Attachment styles Preoccupied attachment style More jealousy Dismissive attachment style Low in relationship dependency Less jealousy Personality traits
High neuroticism More jealousy High agreeableness Less jealousy Traditional gender roles Macho men and feminine women (in regards to personality rather than physical appearance) experience more jealousy than androgynous people. Previous experiences If you have been in a previous relationship with a partner that has cheated on you, or you remain in a relationship in which your partner has cheated on you, you are much more likely to experience suspicious jealousy. Who makes us jealous? o Not all rivals are created equal. Rivals who make us look bad are particularly worrisome: By achieving things we wish we had, or By being more attractive to our partners. o Women tend to be more distressed than men about an emotional affair whereas men tend to be more distressed about a physical, sexual affair. Falls in line with the evolutionary perspective in that men should theoretically be more concerned about “cup-holding” whereas women should be more concerned about loss of emotional support/security. Gender differences in jealousy o Evolutionary perspective suggests that men and women should be sensitive to different kinds of infidelity in their romantic partners.
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