fear.doc

1 when you have experienced a significant traumatic

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focuses on your mistakes and blame, not learning. 1. When you have experienced a significant traumatic loss, you may experience survivor guilt. This is when you feel guilty that you have survived and someone you love has died, become very ill, or lost their home. “Why them and not me?” is the frequent question for the person experiencing survivor guilt. You start to evaluate your life compared to the people who lost their life, health or home. Were you a better person? Is there a reason that they died and you didn’t? We want to believe that bad things only happen to people who deserve it. Not true, bad things just happen. Most guilt is reduced to negative messages you give yourself that persuade you that you are a bad person, wrong, stupid, weak, unlovable or a failure. Survivor guilt is a place where you can get stuck in self-doubt, self-blame, anxiety, and suffering. Unresolved survivor guilt interferes with your well-being, trauma recovery, productive action, your normal progression through life and positive relations. 2. When you stop looking for answers where there are no answers, face what happened and move beyond your guilt; you move into exploring the universal question of “What is my life’s purpose and what is important to me as I live my life?” Reevaluating the meaning of your life and making the best of your life can be a tribute to your survival and to those who lost so much. Learning to treasure the best of each day and being alive can be the gift we receive from living through and experiencing a traumatic event. A New Normal…our lives will be different, our identity will be modified. It is up to us how we allow any event to define us.
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  • Fall '19

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