The three of them also all agree that an open

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The three of them also all agree that an open adoption or at least openness in adoption is much more beneficial than a closed one. From personal experience, the birth father and adoptive father can see how much good an open adoption does for the children and for everyone else involved. It may not take away all of the pain of adoption but it allows it to come into the light and be spoken about and understood and possibly helps it heal over time ((A)Dad, July 21, 2008). The adoptee can tell from the other side that closed adoption only bring more pain and make everything more complicated. Openness in adoption allows everyone to take as much as they need without having to jump through hoops. The birthfather appreciates the open adoption he is involved in. He knows that his son is in a very happy, comfortable, and loving family, but he also gets to be a part of his life. When he visits, his son knows who he is and he does not reject him because he is being raised with his birth father in his life. The set up of their adoption has allowed the entire group to become a strange but working family. The adoptive father is very concerned with keeping the adoptions open and making sure all the birth parents are involved in their children's lives. He sees that it is as important for his children as it is for their birth parents. The birth parents are so happy when they are in the presence of their children and the children will grow up having two of each parent. Specifically, he can already see it with his son. When his birth father comes to visit, he is treated with just as much love as any other family
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The Hidden Voices 8 member. And during one conversation with his adoptive mother, he said “PD is my birth daddy, PM is my birthmom, you're my mommy mommy, and daddy is my daddy daddy” ((A)Dad, July 28, 2008). Puppy is only two years old, but he understands and enjoys that he has birth parents and “parents” parents. Kevin, though he has never experienced open adoption, can tell that it would create a better situation than what he is in. There is already contact between the birth parents and the child which would allow easier access later and the ability to have questions answered. He thinks that education and openness is key in minimizing the pain and struggles associated with adoption. Blog vs Research There is a lot of research in the field of adoption, however there is not much research that targets the viewpoints of the men involved. Birthfather are largely silent and viewed to be either out of the picture or silent supporters. Adoptive fathers are involved but also usually guided by the wishes of their spouse. And adoptees are usually studied in general, without specific focus on gender differences. However, in conjunction with the blogs and extracting information from related studies, it is possible to create a picture of what men in adoption truly feel and what their participation looks like.
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