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Peer Review for Marah Mosely

I would suggest making your thesis as a cause and

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textbooks. I would suggest making your thesis as a cause and effect, the impacts on students (positive or Negative) through teaching and textbooks. 4. I believe that you have addressed the audiences concerns by stating: “A teacher must allow time for students to thoroughly discuss their understanding of the lesson. If the teaching method continues to go on, the students will just know as much until the day of the test.” This is true with the lack of understanding or caring about the total impact the course, the student will only memorize the needed information. You are completely on track with your thesis statement and addressing concerns. 5. Your conclusion seemed to be most effective. I would revise the conclusion in a way that summarizes the entire essay and our opinion on the effects of the argument. 6. Your introduction is a little weak, but has great potential with more focus on a powerful statement that pulls the reader in and wants and believes what you are about to express through writing. 7. I thought the essay was wonderful from my experience as a student. I would suggest a stronger thesis, introduction, and conclusion once you have incorporated your new researches. Think about your transitions from one paragraph to the other. In my first writing class I was taught that the last sentence in a paragraph lead you’re thought into the meaning of the next paragraph, if that makes sense.
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