What hed never readied himself for was the possibility that some day thered

What hed never readied himself for was the

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What he’d never readied himself for was the possibility that, some day, there’d come a point wherehe wouldn’t see Im Jaebum for a long, long time.
xii. crush down / fury redChapter Notessorry if there's any mistakes hehe i had to edit on the way to school!!! enjoy!! <33J I N Y O U N GThe snow falls gently, tiny pristine flakes of ice landing on his jacket; they land on his exposed faceand crown his head with a wintry halo. The cold metal of the car seeps through his jacket where helays on the hood, barely feeling the warmth of Yugyeom’s arm where the younger is sprawled outnext to him. Time ticks by at a snail’s pace with no words exchanged, only the steam clouds fromtheir mouths and noses as they breathe in the silence between them. His cheeks hurt, both from theice and the rubbed raw tear stains. The night sky is black, a curtain drawn across the atmospheredotted with stars. The bright pinpoints of light pinwheel over his eyes as the world rotates ever on,despite not wanting to go with it.“Hyung, I’m sure he’s going to forgive you. He has to. You’re his best friend.”It’s the first thing either of them said in over an hour. Jinyoung watches as the warm cloud ofYugyeom’s breath spirals up away from his mouth and dissipates into the darkness, not respondingwith words but with the tears that burn like ice in his eyes.“Maybe.”But there’s no forgiveness in the trenches, only half-hearted, closed-eye prayers to a god he’s notsure he believes in.It’s been 33 days.**From: Jaebummie 25/12 9:56 pmMerry Christmas, Jinyoungie.To: Jaebummie 25/12 10:22 pmYeah. You too, hyung. **
After a while, it got easier to lose track of time. He stopped waking up every morning to markanother day gone on his calendar with a violent red X. The last count he remembers is 62; the newyear has come and gone without another word between them save for the half-hearted Christmaswish. But 62 was weeks ago, maybe even a month or two. Instead the days just blur together,Monday bleeding into Thursday bleeding into Friday bleeding into Saturday. Jinyoung’s internaltimeline is less like a structured week and more like a hazy conglomerate of events that rattle likeloose change in his pockets. He goes out more, smiling more willingly, though sometimes it still feelslike an open wound across his face. His friends don’t mention it, though: when he smiles, he smiles,and it is a thing to celebrated with comforting pats on the back and smiles of their own rather than theusual berating and teasing. It takes him a while to catch on, but the mutual friends that him andJaebum still share have taken to treating him like fine china. What they have failed to realize on theirown, though, is that he’s already been broken.

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