- Love is the number one topic, tied with religion, that people have always been
Myth #1: Make-up sex
- It happens far less frequently that the media makes it out to be
- For most men, make up sex tells them that the woman is no longer upset and that
everything is fine, whether they are or not
- For most women, make up sex does not properly resolve the issue
- Adds insult to injury
- To fool themselves?
Myth #2: Living together (Co-habitation)
- Make sure you can tolerate each other
- It is convenient and cost-effective to move in together
- Now, it seems to be a more casual step
- Marriage too, becomes a tiny step and a small formality
Living together however, does not predict a lower divorce rate
- Many studies show that it is actually a higher divorce rate
- Religious people are least likely to live together before marriage
- They are also not ‘allowed’ the get divorced
- Far more people are forced into staying married to each other
Humans are Irrational (Men or Women)
- Moving in is a big investment for both people in the relationship
- People don’t like to feel cognitive imbalance; North American people
like to believe that we are smart and good
- When we do something bad or stupid, we can rationalize it away
- Logically, when people do something wrong, they try to
rationalize why they should stay in the relationship
- When long-term couples are in a stressful relationship, they begin
investing in something together (i.e. buying a house together); they
are giving each other an excuse to stay together and cannot leave
Cognitive Dissonance reduction:
- We want to see ourselves as good and positive/ smart. White North
Americans don’t want to believe they did something stupid. But in
they are afraid to admit that they are stupid.
- People twist the reality to accept it and feel better. Coz if they accept it,
they will tend to ask more questions in order to change it.
It is related to Rationalization. In fact it is a fancy name for it.
Check out lines means no return in a relationship. That is the line truly means
you are done in love, commitment. It is broken and will never be fixed.