How to make people like you in 90 seconds or less.html

When it comes to establishing a natural rapport with

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When it comes to establishing a natural rapport with someone, nothing beats talking about shared interests. For obvious reasons, you’re more likely to hit it off with someone who supports the same sports team or reads similar books. But what do you do when no such common ground exists? Well, in such cases you need to establish rapport by design . There are several ways to do this, which we’ll cover in the next couple of blinks, but the prerequisite for all of them is having the right attitude: you can either have a useful attitude or a useless attitude . A useful attitude means you’re focused on what you want out of the conversation, while a useless one is focused on what you don’t. If you display a useful attitude, you will automatically show the positive body language and facial expressions that will make you more likable. On the other hand, having a useless attitude will leave you with passive or negative body language that puts people off. So, if you want to improve your rapport with others, it’s best to adopt a useful attitude. But how exactly should you do this? A useful attitude begins with deciding what you want from each conversation. Therefore, when beginning a conversation, consider your end goal and the approach that will help you reach it efficiently. For instance, say you’re going home for the holidays, and your flight is cancelled. If you have a useless attitude, you’ll be focused on the fact that you don’t want to be stuck at the airport. This may lead to your shouting at the airline staff about how urgently you need a replacement flight. However, if you adopt a useful attitude, you’ll concentrate on your desire to find someone who can help you get another flight. All that screaming and shouting won’t get you the assistance you need, but being open and likeable to a member of the staff might. In short, by focusing on a desired positive outcome from the conversation, you'll automatically adopt the body language and smile that will endear you to those who can actually help you get another flight. To be likable and credible to others, display open and consistent body language. As you’ve learned, a useful attitude is the foundation for effective body language. But what exactly is effective body language? Generally speaking, body language can be divided into two categories: open and closed . Open body language exposes your heart and body, signaling to others that you are not only willing to communicate, but enthusiastic about it. As a result, when two people begin a conversation with their hearts facing one another, they form a powerful connection and mutual trust is likely to increase. On the other hand, closed body language protects the heart through gestures that express resistance, frustration, impatience and nervousness. Crossed arms are one of the most common instances of defensive body language, as crossing one’s arms protect the heart and therefore one’s feelings. Turning your body sideways relative to your conversation partner can also evoke a similar feeling.
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And body language isn’t just about your body. It’s also your facial expressions, which can be open or
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