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psy 205 paper

Commitment is the maintenance component of the

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Commitment is the maintenance component of the relationship. It involved being faithful to your loved one confiding in them and trusting them. When all of these components are working simultaneously you have consummate love or the ultimate love (Sternberg, 2010, p.2). In most relationships only two of these components work at a time. One component might be stronger or weaker than the other so this may change how the relationship is. Zick Rubin a social psychologist devised a different plan than Sternberg to define love. Rubin looks at love as liking vs. loving. Rubin feel that love also has three parts but they are different than Sternberg’s. Rubin feels that love deals with attachment, caring, and intimacy (Psychology of Love, 2010, p.1). Attachment deals with the desire to be with your loved one all the time. It is to cling to them for affection and comfort. Caring as defined by Rubin deals with putting your loved ones needs before yours. It has to do with making sacrifices to ensure your loved ones happiness and your relationships longevity. Intimacy is in the connection between the individuals. It is the bond between two loved ones. It is the heart of the relationship. It is what makes you stay in the relationship and the drive to make you loved ones smile. These are the components that make up love. This is different than just when you like someone. When you say you like another person that is only when we think that that individual has earned our trust, respect, or morals. So In other word love can be looked at as a drive (Psychology of Love, 2010, p.2). It is a psychological process that individuals must have to sustain life. Human beings need four things to sustain a healthy balanced life. Those four things are humans need food, they need water, they need shelter, and humans need to be loved (Sex) (Palfi, 2010, p.1). The love components deal with compassion and companionship. Humans need to feel wanted and needed. It is a biological need that all humans have to have or else they will go insane.
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Elaine Hatfield a psychologist at the University of Hawaii received her BA from the University of Michigan and her Ph.D. from Stanford University. She has received many awards in her field making her an expert on love and attraction. Hatfield believes that there are two basic types of love. They are compassionate vs. passionate love. “Compassionate love is characterized by mutual respect, attachment, affection, and trust. Compassionate love usually develops out of feelings of mutual understanding and shared respect for each other (Wagner, 2010, p.3).” Passionate love is entails strong emotions, sexual arousal, anxiety, and fondness. When these strong emotions are communal, people united with their partner and a strong connection is created. Unreturned love leads to feelings of loneliness and despair. Hatfield suggests that
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Commitment is the maintenance component of the relationship...

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