The marriage hack worked The ones who wrote longer had greater relationship

The marriage hack worked the ones who wrote longer

This preview shows page 55 - 64 out of 83 pages.

The marriage hack worked! The ones who wrote longer had greater relationship quality Default perspective When we fight we tend to adopt our own perspective Also those who did the writing caused them to be less depressed, less stressed, happpier with life Conflicts were just as constant just as severe but they were less angry about it When is the right time? NOW! The relationship is constantly declining
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+ 3/31 Repartnering/Remarriage
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+ Key tasks of Repartnering Process Decision-making in dating Evaluate personal readiness for new relationship Develop criteria and strategies for selecting partners Determine relative weight afforded to child concerns Moving toward marriage Remarriage rates 85% eventually remarry, half within 3 years Expect remarriage rate to decrease because marriage age is higher, but repartner rate the same so will be older when they repartner, more reluctant to get remarried at an older age Rate similar for both sexes Half of all remarriages begin with cohabitation cohabitation
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+ Rewards of Remarriage Compared to first marriage, they Have matured Know each other and themselves better Communicate more openly (more aware of communication problems in previous marriage) Are more considerate Enjoy new interests and friends However Second/Third remarriages actually have higher divorce rate than first Probably because these couples have already been okay with ending a marriage. No religious or moral beliefs against divorce Step families
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+ Step Families Characteristics Remain a “normless norm”- no picturesque step-family Differ from nuclear families Complex family structure More initial stress and conflict Family integration can take years No shared family history
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+ Stability of Remarriages About 60% of remarriages end in divorce More accepting of divorce Less integrated with parents and in-laws (less investment) less willing to care for in-laws in the future In-laws may dislike new partner/ still attached to old partner A lack of problem-solving skills compared to those who stay married Presence of stepkids
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+ Stepparenting Stepparent-child relationships must be developed Generally harder for stepmoms (real mom is more involved) Quasikin- not actual kin No obligation to kid (financially and emotionally) Stepparents must establish discipline and closeness Two biggest problems in stepfamilies: Discipline and authority Adjustment with teens (rules)
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+ Role ambiguity Roles of stepparent and stepchild poorly defined Stepparent has no legally prescribed rights or duties Lower role ambiguity associated with higher remarital satisfaction and parenting satisfaction Adolescent stepchildren may have considerable family power Option of an alternate home More skilled at instigating conflict Strong stepfather figure lessens their power
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+ Effects of stepfamilies on children About half of kids with stepparents are a part of two households, with two sets of rules Negative reactions of kids often short lived, particularly with younger children. But even older children will typically adjust fairly quickly Studies differ on stepchildren’s emotional or academic problems
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