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Stress disrupts our ability to communicate effectively○More likely to snap○Less likely to give support●Social Support○Social support:■Existence of social relationships■Structure of one’s network■Enacted social support○The paradox of social support■Perceived support: The idea that support is available●Generally associated with very positive outcomes■Enacted or received support: An instance of support●Generally associated with negative outcomes, especially negative mood●Possible explanation: When we receive enacted support, there is alreadya stressor present○However, experiments have eliminated this as a possibility○The most common support type: Advice■The support we want the least: Advice○Experiment: Undergraduate paired with a confederate■Told they will have to conduct a public speaking activity that will later be evaluated - this induces stress/anxiety■Participant gives practice talk to the confederate●Confederate remains neutral during the talk
■Before the talk, the confederate is given 1 of 3 support conditions●Support directly○Showed the highest level of anxiety○However, the participants were more likely to indicate that they received support and that they liked the confederate more●Support indirectly (Tell someone else how they did)○Showed the lowest level of anxiety in participants○Why?■Seems more honest and sincere■Seems like more of a confirmation than a criticism●Say nothing○When the type of support we are seeking is the type of support we receive, it’s effective■Easier said than done■Video in class: “It’s not about the nail.”○The Power of Giving■Giving support lights up reward regions in the brain■Giving support reduces mortality risk■Giving support wipes away any negative effect of receivingsupport●Could be that receiving support makes us feel weak/incompetent/etc, while giving support makes us feel strong/adequate/helpful/needed●Gleason’s study○Daily support incentives○Importance of reciprocity■Thus, the power of relationships is thus: Not the power of love, but the power of feeling needed●Conflict○Conflict is unavoidable○Conflict can be detrimental○Gottman’s studies■Videotaped couples having a fight and coded for specific behaviors afterwards●Caveat: Would not be the same as an argument at home; however, we would expect behaviors to only be more prevalent at home●Identified 7 signs of distressed couples that were highly likely to divorce○(Should be noted that his ability to predict divorce is overstated, as his assumptions were made after the fact)■Signs●Harsh start up ○No problem getting the argument started●Flooding○Partner’s negativity is so overwhelming and sudden that the other partner feels shell-shocked●Body Language○Heart rate, hormones, etc
○The use and receipt of problem skills are associated with