Interpersonal Communications Flashcards

Terms Definitions
communication behaviors
positive:                                                        negative:
-listen attentively                                          -dominate
-assist on procedure                                        -block
-summarize, compromize                                  -pleading
-energize, encourage                                      -clowning                                   
olfactory communication
Organization:perception process
Appearance/ Gender
Implicit Personality Theory
Unspoken and unconscious assumptions about qualities in labels. Outgoing means fun, friendly…
Implicit Personality Theory
Stages of a Relationship
Sixth part of listening
Represent how something is
Communication about communication. Verbal or nonverbal.
nonverbal communication
communication without words
-no evaluation on this step
-seeking QUANTITY
-seek to combine and extend
-"free thinking" encouraged (wild ideas)
Principles Of Communication
Intentional or unintentional
conflict techniques that literally silence the other individual
crying, feigning extreme emotionalism, physical reactions
problem: don't know if it's real or face
Orientation toward conflict that assumes everone can win, or benefit, from engaging in conflict and that it is possibele to generate resolutions that satisfy everyone.
Personal Constructs
o Personal Constructs: ‘mental yardstick” we use to measure a person or situation along a bipolar dimension of judgement.
Evaluate Solution
Fact Hat
Feeling Hat
Negative Argument Hat
Positive Benefits Hat
Creative New Idea Hat
Control of Thinking Hat
Takes place within various systems.
Cognitive Complexity
Number of constructs used
Cognitive Complexity
resisitng compliance without any attempt to compromise
accompany and literally illustrate verbal messages. make communication more vivid
seeing or talking with someone
clarify what you're talking about
(comm about comm)
active involvement. . use active listening, paralanguage, and gestures
verbal or nonverbal responses to messages
Bonds between the individuals are broken
Framing Rules
Culturally based guidelines that define the emotional meaning of situations and events.
Cognitive dissonance
discomfort created by holding conflicting thoughts/beliefs simultaneously
Explain Passion
Joy + Surprise = Passion
Reflects level of knowledge & commitment
Effects of Relationship Violence
Physical injury
Psychology Damage
Economic impact (lost days of work)
Understanding both our and their's perspective
Interpersonal Communications
Selective, systemic, unique, and ongoing process of transaction between people
intrarole conflict
when we have contradictory expectations for a single role
Direct Difinition
Labeling directly who we are
Direct Difinition
monitor, maintain, or control speaking of another individual
communication in which one person speaks and the other listens; there's no real interaction among participants
an expression whose overuse calls attention to itself
relationship communication
communication between or among intimates or those in close relationships; used by theorists as synonomous with interpersonal communication
depth listening
reveals another level; underlying message and opportunity for a connection with the speaker
reward power
the ability to reward people
emotional appeals
persuasive tactics directed at arousing emotional responses
Negative relationships in SET
rewards < costs
dont be selfish; express importance of the other person. maintain eye contact, nod, lean foward
Misconceptions of Communication
Effective Communication isn't a natural ability.
anything that inter feres with a message
Communication Competence
Communication that is effective and appropriate in a given situation.
Relationship Turning Points
Various movements throughout a relationship. they can be positive or negative and vary by culture. Turning points occur gradually and are defined by signifigant events which alter the nature of the relationship
Assumption that our culture and its norms are the only right ones, reflects certainty which tends to create defensive communication climates.
Emotional Intelligence
Ability to recognize which feelings are appropriate in which situations and the skill to communicate those feelings effectively.
Relational Maintenance Strategies
* actions that sustain/maintain/repair relationship- both strategic and routine- Strategic: intentionally chosen and enacted (we need to talk)- Routine: byproduct of everyday activities and interactions (make dinner)
o I-thou comm
• Highest form of human dialogue because each person affirsm the other as cherished and unique.• See them as human beings.
What category of the Jahari's window includes things like you have bad breath?
Informal Networking
Done everyday
When you're in new situation (new kid) or when you have to answer question
I-It Communication
Others treated impersonally. Not as people, faceless communication so to speak
A person's capacities and patterns of forming and maintaing intimate relationships, shaped in part by the quality of the first emotional bond with the mother or other primary caregiver.
Point of view shaped by material, social, and symbolic conditions
Us! Our beliefs and social factors, etc…
transactional perspective
process with elements that are interdependent
ignore or refuse to acknowledge your emotions to yourself or others
low-context culture
most information is explicitly stated in verbiage; USA is considered low context
masculine culture
emphasizes success and socialize their people to be assertive, ambitous, and competitive. more likely to fight other cultures and confront conflicts directly
talks only about topics that are self-related
has many complaints and rarely tires of listing each of them
acknowledge the presence of the other person but also indicate your acceptance of this preson, this person's definition of self, and your relationship as defined or viewed by this person
individual racism
negative attitudes or beliefs that people hold about a specific race
study of how the dilation, or constriction of pupils effects the other persons reaction to your verbal and non-verbal communication
static evaluation
orientation that fails to recognize that the world is constantly changing
understanding that you can never know all about anything and that what you know, say, or hear is only a part of what there is to know, say, or hear
Expressive - sd
a need to be heard
Types of Relational Messages
The power to influence one another.
Relational Dimension
messages that carry signals about the nature of the relationship in which they are shared. ex. roomate says we are out of detergent, but the message is understood as "its your turn to buy detergent"
You ask your partner directly how he or she feels or you disclose your own feelings
A condition in which the breadth and depth of a relationship decrease (like topic of discussion)
Usually happens when a relationship begins to deteriorate
Relational dialects
Opposing forces, or tensions, that are normal parts of all relationships.
Looking at whether you are getting back what you put into the relationship describes what theory?
Equity Theory
General stages of Romantic Relationships
1) Flirting
2) Initiating
3) Experimenting
4) Intensifying
5) Integrating
6) Bonding
We assume we know what others thinks, feels, or perceives
I-Thou Communication
Each person affirms the other as cherished and unique. We open up in these communications.
What is interpersonal communication governed by?
rules (norms &amp; roles)
Johari window
a model for conceptualizing levels of awareness and self-disclosure in human communication: a way of looking at the interdependence of intrapersonal and interpersonal affairs.
Linear Models
A one-way process. Had problems, like they portary communication as a one-way process
intimate distance
where the presence of another is unmistakable; usually within 18&quot;
willing to present your ideas even if there is opposition
information overload
condition in which the amount of complexity of information is too great to be dealt with effectively by an individual, group, or organization
the degree to which you penetrate the inner personality-the core-of the other individual
process by which you seek to account for and understand the reasons and motivations for your own behaviors
face-detracting conflict strategy
strategies that attack a person's positive face or a person's negative face
Seeking validation - sd
understanding, knowing that it's ok
influence of culture on RELATIONSHIPS
family can be anyone 
-gays and lesbians
-unmarried ppl living together
-non nuclear families
-single parent homes
Social Validation
If you can make people believe that many others have done what you've requested, they'll be more likely to follow
Literal listening
Listening only to the content level of meaning and ignoring the relationship level of meaning.
Socioemotional selectivity theory
- older individuals sense more limited future- pay more attention to short-range goals: some things become less important/might talk about more revealing info- cope with negative effects, control emotions better- make interpersonal relationships easier, less volatile- older people more lonely without partner~ especially men.
7 Causes of Relationship Deterioration
1. Differing beliefs - Rules-Roles-Expectations
2. Excessive intimacy claims (possessiveness)
3. Third Party relationships (friend, relative)
4. Relationship changes (grow apart)
5. Financial Problems - bigger deal for men
6. Work related problems
7. Sex-related (passion)
Reasons To Avoid Workplace Romance
Increase employee satisfaction and committment to organization
Decreased turnover
Basis for mentoring and networking
psychological time
refers to a person's emphasis on, or orientation toward, the past, present, or future
dyadic effect
tendency of behaviors of one person to stimulate similar behaviors in the other
Children and sd
1) mom vs dad2) satisfaction, ex) disclose to mother=more happy3) Amount discrepancy4) Parents vs. Peers
2 parts of social organization
(the way we do something)
part one:
1)structure-roles ppl play,
 BORMAN-'leaders vs.followers'
-underachievers-dont care or more inportant things to do
-uninformed/unskilled (not familiar with)
-overactive (want to be achiever)
CARTER & COUCH-prominence (the more you talk the more attention you get), task skill, socioemotional skill (how easy to work with)
-all helps determine our role in the group
Referent power
A type of power in which you make others wish to be like you or to be identified with you.
Depends greatly on attractiveness and prestige
Exit Response
1 of 4 ways to respond to conflict; leave conflict either spychologically or physically, this is active and generally destructive.
Other Observations from the Movie
We saw relationship deterioration as the man began withholding information/one-word answers to wife. In addition, he began to lie.
The woman, in both her marriage and relationship, found her partner due to proximity.  Lack of effective rule-making in both relationships caused intermittent breakdown.  However, later in the movie, the clear deal-breaker was lying.
Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
When we behave in a way that reflects peoples beliefs about us
Secure Children Communication Patterns
\"goodness of fit\" in terms of stimulation, responsive to basic needs, consistently caringgoodness of fit = provide amounts of caring/support/attention that the child wants
comparison level
a general idea of the kinds of rewards and profits that you feel you ought to get out of such a relationship
Social Exchange Theory (SET)
rewards and cost in terms of relationship, why ppl stay in a relationship.
fundamental human needs
why do we need relationships? need to form and maintain strong, stable interpersonal relationships
List 6 reasons why we maintain relationships
(even bad ones)
1. emotional attachment
2. convenience (laziness)
3. kids
4. fear (financial, being alone)
5. commitment
6. inertia (comfortable)
Why is interpersonal communication more immediate than other types of communication?
There is less distraction, and nothing in the way
Any message sent or received has what
two dimensions (content &amp; relational)
eye contact to signal status
used to signal status or agression. looking at someone too long may appear hostile
Assumption about the nature of the relationship (SET)
1) Relationships are interdependent, ex: Prisoner's dilemna2) relational life is a process, time and experiences guides our judgment, guiding changes
What is the basic idea behind the Uncertainty Reduction theory?
You are learning to trust your partner
Stranger on a Plane/Train phenomenon
never expect to see that person in your life, violate all rules of self-disclosure, because theres no risk, you'll never see them again
Keys for effective narratives
- has a point- told quickly- ppl need to sense you care about it- inclusive- suspense- vivid detail- validate basic values- is personal- use factoids - interesting facts that are revelant
What is key for intimacy in an IP relationship?
Reciprocity, trust, commitment, and caring
What is an example of dialectics?
The need to be yourself vs. the need to be connected with others
How are disruptive power and norms related to interpersonal communication?
In society you expect things to be a certain way. If someone's power over you if affecting the way you can communicate with them, perhaps they have the power to not listen to you, you can't communicate with them. And if certain norms, such as groups not being allowed to be in a certain place are accepted, those groups cannot communicate with other groups.
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