200 Word response needed.
Follow Summary/Response Guideline
My Purpose Statement The audience of my essay will be my classmates and my instructor for my English 111 course, Professor Alicia Slocum. I am writing for an Ivy Tech online course. I believe that my essay contains information that my classmates will have some prior knowledge of, but for the most part, the information contained will be new and understandable for any reader. This topic is entirely applicable to the time period we are living in as food and poverty has become a major concern in areas, not just in our country, but around the world. My hope in writing this summary and response is to allow the readers to see the issues presented in this article as well as to give them the tools to form their own opinions on the subject matter, regardless of a possible bias in the viewpoint of the original article. The medium I will be using is a formal academic manuscript.
A Failure in Technology With the demographic expansion of our country, the United States, it has become apparent that states are struggling to provide citizens living below the poverty line with the compensations they need like welfare, Medicaid, etc. In an attempt to keep up with the growing population, states have allocated millions of dollars into building a computer networking system designed to send money to those qualifying for government financial aid. A computerized filing system seems like a good idea in theory, but when used in practice, many states felt the devastating effects of failure as they watched thousands of families starve. In the work titled, “How a Government Computer Glitch Forced Thousands of Families to go Hungry,” author, Gerry Smith, explained that one state in particular had the biggest challenge integrating technology. This state happens to be North Carolina. I believe that technology can be a valuable resource, but when it is not properly applied, it can lead to catastrophes. Technology exists to make our lives easier. When used properly, it enables us to perform tasks at a much faster and less stressful rate. “A computer system has been designed by Accenture (Paragraph 8),” a company that is responsible for setting up networks of computers programmed to send money to people who are unemployed, disabled, etc. Smith found that thousands of families in North Caroline were no longer receiving welfare checks due to a computer glitch in the system. As a result, these families began to congregate in front of food pantries for hours before the doors would open so they could obtain enough food to feed their children for another few days. Smith also wrote, “Accenture won the North Carolina contract after spending thousands of dollars on political contributions and lobbying in the state (Paragraph 8). ” This is a key component in the article because Smith found that at least six other states terminated contracts with Accenture due to dissatisfaction with their service (Paragraph 9).
WRITING PROJECT 1: Summary and Response Peer Response Description Consult CHAPTER 3 of Writing: Ten Core Concepts , Step 7, to develop and complete your peer response. Giving Feedback 1. Find the WP1 Peer Response Board. During Class Session 2, Frst drafts of Writing Project 1 were posted in the WP1 Peer Response Board in the Discussions page. Go to the Discussions page and scroll down to Fnd this board. If you did not yet post your draft in this board, do this now! (See instructions in Class Session 2.) You will need to post a draft in order to provide responses to your peers’ drafts. 2. Choose drafts to review. Read as many drafts as you can and choose two drafts that have not yet received any feedback to respond to in detail. NOTE : To ensure that ALL students receive feedback, it is important that you Frst respond to drafts that have received NO feedback yet. If you Fnd that all drafts have received feedback, then look for a draft that has only received feedback from one person. DO NOT respond to a draft that has already received feedback from two other peers unless no other options are available. Download each draft to your computer and save them with a name that will make them easy to identify later. 3. Write Peer Response. ±or each review, respond to at least 4 of the following 5 peer response questions, choosing questions based on which you think will be most help to each peer. Write your answers on the last page of the downloaded copies of the drafts you have selected and label each answer with the letter that corresponds with the question answered. Provide as many speciFcs as possible, quoting from your peers’ drafts as applicable and providing speciFc suggestions for improvement. A. Analyze the writer’s summary of the core reading. Does it clearly identify the reading being summarized? Could a reader unfamiliar with the core reading get a good sense of what the core reading is about based on the summary? Does the summary capture the main idea(s) of the core reading and some of the major supporting points and details? Is the summary objective and fair? Is it accurate? What works best? What is missing? B. Analyze the writer’s response to the core reading. Does the writer provide a clear and distinct opinion about the ideas in the core reading or the e²ectiveness of the core reading? Does the writer back up his or her opinions with evidence? Does the response seem accurate and consistent with the core reading? What works best? What is missing? C.Analyze the medium and form of the draft. Does the organization of the draft make it easier to read or does it make it more confusing? Is there a clear introduction with thesis, a body, and a conclusion? Does the introduction su³ciently introduce the topic and main ideas? Does it draw the reader into the project? Does the conclusion adequately sum up the project? Does it emphasize the writer’s main ideas and leave readers with a lasting impression? Does the writer use appropriate academic formatting? What works best? What is missing?
D.Analyze the writing style used in the draft. Is the writing generally clear and readable? Are there passages that are confusing, awkward, or diFcult to follow? Does the writer’s voice come through clearly and e±ectively? How well has the writer written appropriately and e±ectively for a general audience of academic peers? What works best? What is missing? E. If you could take over this draft and make one important change or revision in the content or organization, what would you change, and why? (Note: Do not comment on grammar or formatting here but focus on content and organization.) 4. Post Your Responses. Click “Reply” in your peers’ threads in the WP1 Peer Response Board. Attach your peer response as a Word document so that your peer can download and keep your advice. Then click “Submit.” WRITING PROJECT 1: Summary and Response Peer Response Assessment Specifcs & Grading Rubric The following provides speci²c information for completing and submitting your peer responses in Session 3. PEER RESPONSES - Due in Class Session 3 (15 points) Peer Response Specifcs Respond to two peer drafts Responses posted as “Replies” to threads in the WP1 Peer Response Board Answer at least 4 of the 5 peer response questions (your choice) per peer response; selected answers labeled with corresponding letter for clarity Answers written in complete sentences Minimum 200 words per response (successful peer responses are often much longer) Peer Response Rubric Criteria Points Peer responses are in full sentences and clearly address all of the peer response questions selected for the speci²c writing project. Peer response questions are labeled with the corresponding letter for clarity and the required number of questions is answered. ³or this assignment, students should answer 4 out of 5 questions per response. 5
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