Please check and correct my work. I have the student example and rubic

of this assignment. My file is attached. Thank you
Week Four Assignment 1:
For this assignment, you will be asked to rewrite the following paragraph using the principles of cohesion discussed in Chapter 9. Please consider looking at a strong topic sentence along with strong supporting details. In addition make sure your revised paragraph includes sentence transitions, logical idea development, repeating key words, clear writing, demonstrative pronouns, and parallel structure.
Note: You may revise the sentences that are are here for clarity and you mayonly add up to three new sentences to make this more robust.  However, you must keep the original meaning intact.
Revision Paragraph: “Canadian software companies face several tough challenges in the new millennium because of "brain drain," the weak Canadian dollar, and the monopoly held by their American counterparts. However, the Canadian dollar continues its downward spiral even today. "Brain drain" is a bad thing. Our greatest resources are leaving. Microsoft is squeezing out its competitors. In comparison, if the "brain drain" continues, Canadian companies will find it difficult to produce innovative software. The weak dollar will hurt us. It will help the Americans.”
Week Four Assignment 2:
Write a draft containing the three beginning paragraphs of Chapter One explaining the topic you chose in week two. Your job is to concentrate how you would set up an introduction to Chapter One with your specific topic in mind. You will follow the cohesion principles discussed in chapter nine. I will be grading you on clarity of writing and your ability to explain your topic to an appropriate audience. Please review how the chapters are set up in your Technical Communication book. You may also review the student examples posted in the conference area. Also, take some time to do some research on your own to learn about the look and feel of chapters in miscellaneous technical manuals.
Important Note:  You may write more than three paragraphs for Chapter One, however this week I will only be grading you on the first three chapters.

Part A:
Write at least three paragraphs of your first chapter. Each paragraph should contain at least 100 words. Introduce your topic and follow the attributes of the rubric posted above. Make sure to review the student examples posted in the discussion area. These should give you a general idea of how a chapter is set up. Hint: This class discussion should help you tremendously with this assignment.
• Develop a tone appropriate for your audience. Review the Week One lecture notes for a refresher on identifying and understanding audiences.
• Include cohesion principles: sentence transitions, logical idea development, repeating key words, clear writing, demonstrative pronouns, and parallel structure.
Part B:
• Identify your audience in a separate paragraph.  Explain how much experience your audience has with your topic. This paragraph should contain at least100 words.

3 Attachments
Student Example 1: The key to every rock guitar solo is the pentatonic scale. Let me guess, you’ve been playing guitar for a year or so? Maybe your guitar playing was in a rut like mine was? You’ve learned your basic chords, can play a few songs, maybe even attempted to learn a couple solos? But, you feel your guitar playing is missing something and you’re not sure what it is? My guitar teacher once told me, “If there is one scale you need learn, it is the pentatonic scale.” To improve your guitar playing, you will need to learn how to play the pentatonic and then understand how to apply it to your guitar playing. In the following sections we will go over: What is the pentatonic scale? How to play the pentatonic scale. How to apply the pentatonic scale to your guitar playing. The word "pentatonic" comes from the Greek "pente" meaning five and the Latin "tonicus" meaning tone. Don’t worry, this isn’t a lesson in Greek and Latin. You just need to remember that the pentatonic scale is a scale with only 5 tones (notes). Even though the scale only has five notes, every guitarist from B.B King to Slash to Eddie Van Halen uses these same 5 tones (notes) within the pentatonic scale as base to build their solos. The pentatonic scale is mainly used in blues, rock, and country music. For many blues guitarists, the pentatonic scale is the one and only scale they play. Now that you know the meaning of the pentatonic scale, it is time for you to pick your guitar up and learn how to play it. To show you how to play the pentatonic minor scale, we will keep it simple by using tablature (refer to figure 1). Tablature is a good way of teaching the pentatonic scale because it helps you visual the scale, “imprinting” a snap shot of it within your brain, as your fingers are working on muscle memory. I will also take it note by note for you so that there is no confusion on what notes to play. We will start with the pentatonic in the open (or 1 st ) position. 1. Play the open E note on the 6 th string (aka the low E string or the thickest string). 2. Play the G note on the 6 th string 3rd fret. 3. Play the open A note on the 5 th string. 4. Play the B note on the 5th string 2 nd fret. 5. Play the open D note on the 4 th string. 6. Play the E note on the 4 th string 2 nd fret. 7. Pay the open G note on the 3 rd string. 8. Play the A note on the 3 rd string 2 nd fret. 9. Play the open B note on the 2 nd string.
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Week 4 Assignment Part 1: Incoherent: “Canadian sofware companies Face several tough challenges in the new millennium because oF "brain drain," the weak Canadian dollar, and the monopoly held by their American counterparts. However, the Canadian dollar conTnues its downward spiral even today. "Brain drain" is a bad thing. Our greatest resources are leaving. Microsof is squeezing out its compeTtors. In comparison, iF the "brain drain" conTnues, Canadian companies will ±nd it di²cult to produce innovaTve sofware. ³he weak dollar will hurt us. It will help the Americans.” Coherent: Canadian sofware companies have been Facing several tough challenges recently because oF ‘brain drain,’ and the monopoly held by American corporaTons. ‘Brain drain’ is a catchy new term For the pracTce oF American companies enTcing brilliant Canadian doctors, scienTsts, researchers, programmers, and business people to cross over the border into the United States. ³he U.S. ±rms lure the Canadian talent with the compeTTve research and business edge that many such companies have as a result oF industry monopolies. Simply put, Canadian companies are being soundly beaten because they ±nd themselves on a playing ±eld that is not always level. Part 2 Up and Running VPN with Amazon VPC In this ±rst chapter, we will give you an explanaTon oF Amazon VPC, Amazon Web Services (AWS), and VPN. Once you got a clear idea oF Amazon VPC and VPN, we will discuss about how to set up your own Amazon VPC as well as some script to maintain your private server. 1. What is Amazon VPC? Amazon Virtual Private Cloud (Amazon VPC) enables you to launch Amazon Web Services (AWS) resources into a virtual network that you've de±ned. ³his virtual network closely resembles a tradiTonal network that you'd operate in your own data center, with the bene±ts oF using the scalable inFrastructure oF AWS. As you get started with Amazon VPC, you should understand the key concepts oF this virtual network, and how it is similar to or di´erent From your own networks. In this ±rst chapter, we will provides you a brieF descripTon oF the key concepts oF Amazon VPC. 2. Understanding VPC A virtual private cloud (VPC) is the logical division oF a service provider's public cloud mulT-tenant architecture to support private cloud compuTng in a public cloud environment. Just as a virtual private network (VPN) provides secure data transFer over the public Internet, a VPC provides secure data transFer between a private enterprise and a public cloud provider, ensuring that each customer's data remains isolated From every other customer's data both in transit and inside the cloud provider's network. ³his can be accomplished through the use oF security policies requiring
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Introduction to Week Four: Understanding the General Structure of a Chapter This week you will look closely at the individual chapter in a technical manual. Chapters are the heart of the technical manual, and this is the section in the book that the reader depends on the most to accomplish a goal. If the author does not take careful effort to write this carefully and succinctly, the reader will not continue with the book. In essence, this is the place where we will base our more important assignments in this class. If you take time and put in efforts to learn the material in this week, this should help you to write a chapter in your own manual later on in the course. This week you will spend time dissecting and analyzing the following sections in a chapter: Chapter Introduction Individual Paragraph Numbered Instructions Conclusion Dissecting Individual Chapter Sections Chapter Introduction An introduction for a chapter in a book is more specific than the introduction seen in the front matter of the book. The chapter introduction introduces the specific chapter in an exciting way and explains the contents and purpose. This also explains the outcome of the chapter, or what the reader can expect to achieve. For example, if the reader is thumbing through a manual on how to plant and fertilize dogwood trees properly, he/she might go to the introduction to look figure out if this chapter will help to achieve that goal. Individual Paragraphs A paragraph in a technical manual follows the same principles that a regular paragraph in an essay follows. In short, a paragraph consists of a series of sentences that are organized and are all related to the topic sentence. A paragraph shows where the subdivisions of a paragraph start and end. Thus the goal is to help the reader see the organization of the chapter and to understand the main points. Paragraphs in a manual can contain many different kinds of information. A paragraph could contain a series of brief examples or a single long illustration of a general point. It might describe a process; narrate a series of events; compare or contrast two or more things; classify items into categories; or describe causes and effects. Regardless of the paragraph’s contents, all paragraphs share certain characteristics. One of the most important of these is a topic sentence. Topic Sentences The function of a well-organized paragraph is to support or develop a single controlling idea. This is expressed in a topic sentence. A topic sentence has several important functions: it substantiates or supports an essay’s thesis statement, and it unifies the content of a paragraph and directs the order of the sentences; and it advises the reader of the subject to be discussed and how the paragraph will discuss it. Readers generally look to the first few sentences in a paragraph to determine the subject and perspective of the paragraph. That’s why it’s often best to put the topic sentence at the very beginning of the paragraph.
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